The Cleaner
by Xx.Eru.dess.xX
Summary: They call me “The Cleaner”, but you’ll never hear it come from my mouth. They call me a God, but I don’t believe them. They call me a child, but I’ll never listen. He calls me in the middle of the night, and I let myself cry.
1. Chapter 1

Title: The Cleaner (Five hundred points for whoever guesses where I got that name

Title: The Cleaner (Five hundred points for whoever guesses where I got that name. And _don't_ read the disclaimer, cause that's cheating! D:)

Rating (of d00m!): Well… actually, I probably should be more serious about this, but… it's going to be rated M. For… obvious reasons once you read the warnings. Or… just open up the story for that matter, cause it starts out with that shit. :D

Authors Note: YAY NEW STORY!! I got this idea in my head at about 7:00 last night, and I haven't been able to get it out since. Let me just say it… this is sort of my "Home away from Home" for DN Cell. Don't get me wrong, I'm not quitting it or anything, it's just… I'm a born multitasker, and I just _had_ to have something else to work on. Besides the fact that this is probably… oh… the single best idea I've ever had! XD Well, I doubt that, but… it's really close. Oh, I almost forgot. OFFICIAL NOTICE: This is a _replacement_ for "Crossing The Unknown". Which, if you read my "Upcoming Stories" file, you would see it was one of the stories listed. Sorry if you were looking forward to that, but now you get a better model! Anyway… Holy shit, I'm actually running out of things to say… OH! Remember that friend I told you about that was writing a story? Well… she gave me permission to post it up here, so look for it really soon. It's called "Sudden Death", and it's a Death Note related thing. And… if reading that story, you come across someone writing little notes called the "Editor". That's me. :D She's the author, and because I'm so horribly anal, I have to be the editor. But I really, really want you guys to read it! She's an incredible writer, and I'm sure all of you will love it! Anyway… I really better stop rambling, now that I've taken up a lot of space. YAY, I love doing that. Anyway… on to the story, betches!

Summary: They call me "The Cleaner", but you'll never hear it come from my mouth. They call me a God, but I don't believe them. They call me a child, but I'll never listen. They call me names, but they don't hurt. He calls me in the middle of the night, and I let myself cry.

Pairings: LxLight, like usual. You know, I really shouldn't have to put anything here anymore. I should just say: "The Usual." And then every one of you guys should know what I'm talking about. D:

Warnings: Yay, lot's o' warnings! XD that's always nice.

This. Is. Not. For. Kids.

An elaboration, this is not for kids for many reasons… I will list them.

1. Drug abuse. (Just because I write about it, does _not_ mean it's okay. I can't stress this guys, and I know I sound like your freakin' mom, but DRUGS ARE STUPID. Don't do it. And… furthermore, don't do the shit I write about. Please.)

2. Um… gayness? (Lol. Well, that's just an immediate when you open up _my_ stories, so… but if you don't like two boys thrown together, get out. )

3. Language. (Seriously. Of course you know that's going to happen with me, obviously. I have the largest mouth on the planet, and you guys are gonna fucking hear about it! –shakes fist-)

4. (Oh, no… I _really, really, __**really**_hate putting this here, but…) Character death. (In the very end, and you don't know who it is, so… nyeh! D:)

5. AU. (If you want something actually _following_ the story line of Death Note, my stories aren't exactly it. Because… that shit's too complicated.)

Disclaimer: All right, if you're reading this just because you want to figure out where I got the title from, just because you want 500 points… _SHAME ON YOU!!_ –hits you with broom- Heh…heh. Anyway, if you haven't guessed, I got the title from this new show that's on here. (I don't know if it's on anywhere else in the world… but… I'm in America, and I know it's on there.) It's called… tadah, "The Cleaner", and it's odd that I would choose the title, because… I. HATE. THAT. DAMN. SHOW. It's sooo stupid, and I can't stand to be in the same room with it. D: But… I guess I stole more than the title, because what Light does in this story is basically what the guy does in that story. Enjoy? D:

All right, this… is going to be kind of suckish, because I know absolutely NOTHING about drugs. I don't know if Heroin is illegal in Japan, but… I'm guessing it is. I just spent the last forty-five minutes on Wikipedia looking at an article about Heroin. Yeah… really sad, I know. Well… at least I know a little more now. A little. Anyway, this story is from Light's POV, and it's going to be written as each day that Light is with him. If you're wondering: Why the hell are you calling him "Elle", it's because in this story, it's AU… and I wanted him to have a semi-normal name, okay? Okay. (Elle's name? Spelled: E-l-l-e, pronounced: L.)

Anyway, because the summary is MAJOR confusing, here's what this is about: So here's what it's about. Light Yagami is 19, and he works for the NPA. They call him "The Cleaner", because of his job. What does he do? He helps people overcome their addictions. After finishing a rather nasty case ending in suicide, he is called to help a young detective named Elle Lawliet with his addiction to Heroin. (Elle is pronounced like "L") At first meeting they don't get along, but that changes over the course of their month together. They both help each other in some strange way.

XxX

Chapter 1

My name is Yagami Light. I am 19 years old and currently employed at the NPA. Most people there, when they see me, call me "The Cleaner". Just for the record, I hate that name. I don't think it suits me at all. It suits my job, but I hate thinking about what I do. If you're wondering what I do, I help people get over their addictions. Whether it is drugs, sex, gambling… you name it. I'm the one that brings them back forth into a normal life. I'm quite good at what I do, despite my age… and most of the people I have helped are now functioning members of society. I check up on them every so often, just to see how they're doing. None of them have ever gone back to their addiction. Ever. But then again, some of them have ended up dead. Either they had been murdered, or they committed suicide. There… are just some people I can't help. I'm not perfect.

Some of them call me a God, but I refuse to acknowledge it. I'm not a God, I just help people. What's so Godly about that? I'm making the world a better place, but… I don't want to be revered as a God; it's… just not my type of compliment. Enough about me, though.

XxXxXxX

(August 9, 2008)

I was given his address (which, nonetheless, I am not able to disclose here) and the date and time on which to arrive. I hadn't spoken with him before in person, only on the phone. He had a very calm voice, despite what I was told about him. I was worried, but… I always am when it comes to people older than me. I feel that they look down on me because of my age; most of the people at the NPA do.

He lived in a very nice place; I assumed it must have cost a good deal of money. Two floors, with Ionic style pillars leading the way to the front door. The whole outside of the house was brick, and it gave the impression that it would be very clean on the inside. Getting out of my car, I took the crumpled piece of paper with his name from my pocket and looked at it. "Elle Lawliet." I said out loud, not quite sure how to pronounce his first name. '_How strange._' I thought. '_I wonder where he's from…?_' I stuffed it back in my pocket, my heart beating loudly. Something about that man made me nervous, and I wasn't going to find out why until later.

Feeling somewhat closed in as I knocked on the door, I looked around. When that didn't help to calm my nerves, I went through my own personal steps in my head. '_Step one: Identify the addiction. Step two: Understand their history and their reasons. Step three…_' I stopped going over the steps, extremely annoyed. "Why is it taking him so long to open the fucking door?" I said, sighing loudly. I had been out there a good two minutes, and I didn't even hear footsteps. Looking to the right of the door, I noticed a doorbell. I punched it angrily with my finger several times, my temper flaring. (That was one of the reasons I felt I was inadequate for the job; my temper.)

After a few more minutes of waiting angrily, the door swung open in front of my eyes. Right when I was about to tell him off, he stepped out from behind so I could see him better. All my anger dissipated in those few seconds, replaced with genuine confusion. Sure, most of the people I had dealt with that were strung out on drugs looked like shit (you expected them too), but _nothing_ compared to him in the two years I had been working with the NPA.

He was tall, just a little taller than I was, but that wasn't what took me by surprise. He was so… disheveled isn't the word, but it's pretty damn close. What took me in at first were his eyes. They were wild, and huge, and the darkest blue I had ever seen… almost black. He had telltale dark circles underneath, signaling he probably hadn't slept for a day and a half or so. His hair was as dark as his eyes, even darker still, and it looked like it hadn't been combed in months, maybe even _years_. His long bangs fell over his forehead, but didn't conceal his eyes. Something that worried me was how thin he was. He was bordering on malnutrition he was so skinny, and I wondered if he had an eating disorder along with his addiction. He wore a white t-shirt and dark jeans, that both looked at least four sizes too big for him.

It took a while of staring before I finally remembered to speak. But when I did, it came out as a raspy squeak. I cleared my throat and tried again. "E-Elle Lawliet?" I asked. His eyes narrowed and he looked me up and down before shaking his head no.

"Oh. Then… could you tell me where he is?" I breathed a sigh of relief. So I _had_ gotten the wrong person. Good. Because, not to be rude or anything, but I really didn't want to spend my time with that man.

"No, that's not what I meant." I opened my mouth to speak, but closed it again. '_Damn it! He sounds like the man I spoke with on the phone, it's probably him…_' "I meant that's not how you pronounce my name."

"Oh. Sorry, then… how is it—"

"You pronounce it like the letter 'L'." My jaw dropped. '_Who… is this guy?_' He looked down for a second before stepping aside. "Come in." His voice held a heavy tone, like he didn't want me to be there, almost like I was unwelcome. Somehow, I didn't blame him. If I were him, I wouldn't want somebody telling me what to do with my life. But that was my job, and… it was what I had to do. I nodded a quick thanks and stepped inside.

I was right about my intuition that it was clean. I wondered if he had a maid for a while; I didn't think this man was capable of cleaning _anything_, really. The floor in the hallway was hardwood, a lighter color. Not something I would have chosen myself, but it still looked good. My shoes clacked loudly, and I stopped walking a few steps in. Everything was completely silent, something I hated. I needed to have some type of background noise, but I wasn't about to bother him.

"Hey." His voice from behind me made me jump a little, and I turned around to face him. He had a serious, judging expression across his pale face. "You're him, aren't you?" I tried to speak again, but he threw me off so much I could barely find my voice. "Don't they call you 'The Cleaner'?" I swallowed loudly. '_Jesus, so he knows too? Well… he's a detective, he works with the NPA, I wouldn't be surprised…_'

"Yeah." I finally answered. "That's me. But… if we're going to be personal about this, you can call me Raito." I turned around to face him, looking him straight in the eyes. My attempt to be intimidating didn't faze him as much as I would have liked.

"Raito?" He repeated slowly, almost as if trying out my name. He then shrugged his thin shoulders and brushed quickly past me to close and lock the door.

"Mm-hm, you write it with the characters for…"

His eyes bored into me harshly, and I lost my voice and trailed off pathetically. "I don't care." He mumbled.

"W-well… okay. What should I call you?"

"What do _you_ think?" I almost felt like asking, 'why do you answer _everything_ with a question! This isn't a fucking game, you know!' But I kept my mouth shut, refusing to answer. Taking note of my silence, he quickly added: "I'm just joking. Call me Elle." I nodded curtly and crossed my arms, trying to keep my gaze away from him and his creepy eyes. He started walking ahead of me, and I jogged to catch up with him. He moved surprisingly fast for what I thought, and he took longer strides than I did. I looked to my right, and a large spiraling staircase loomed over my shoulder. Slowing my pace to stare at it, I was jolted when I felt a hand grab my arm. I looked down and saw his pale fingers intertwining with the fabric of my shirt. Damn it, his hand was cold! "Are you coming or are you going to snoop around?"

I couldn't take it anymore. This guy was just too damn rude! "That's my fucking _job_." I snarled back, but he didn't do anything. I thought I saw the corner of his mouth tug up slightly in a half-hearted smirk, but it may have been my imagination. Still not letting go of my arm, he led me through an archway into what I assumed was his living room. I looked around, and all I saw was bookshelves. There must have been thousands and thousands of books in that room. I was so mesmerized I almost forgot his hand on my arm, and bumped hard into the corner of his couch.

"Shit!" I whispered angrily, trying to ignore the throbbing pain in my knee. He let go of my arm and turned around. I felt my face flush.

"Pardon?" I shook my head, embarrassed.

"N-nothing, never mind. Sorry…" He shrugged with ease and led me over to the offending couch. He himself sat on one end while I nervously sat on the other. I looked up, and my jaw dropped for the second time that day. He was curled in on himself, his knees pressed hard up against his wiry chest. He wrapped his arms around his legs and pulled them closer, if that was even possible. I blinked once, twice… just trying to take him all in. I shifted uncomfortably and finally remembered to take out the small notebook and pencil I had in my pocket.

I opened my mouth to speak, to ask my first question, but he interrupted me. "Why are you here?" I lost my grip on my pencil and it clattered to the floor loudly as I stared at him dumbly. '_Is he being serious? Or is he just joking like he did earlier?_' A million options raced through my head until he bent over and handed me back my pencil. As he placed it gently in front of me, he asked again: "Why are you here? Or do I have to guess?"

I spat out the first words that came to my mind. "Are you fucking serious?" I felt my face grow even redder after I said it; it was evident that he didn't always like my choice of language. I closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose between my fingers. After I breathed for a couple seconds, I looked back up. "I mean… back there, you said you knew who I was. Why are you asking?"

"I said I knew who you were, I never said I knew what you did. At least…" His eyes trailed around the room absentmindedly, and once again I was transfixed. "…I don't recall saying that." I swallowed. He was right, after all. He never said he knew what I did… but… how could he not know? '_Is this guy a total recluse or something? Everybody knows what I do…_'

"Okay, fine. I understand." I smoothed the back of my hair, my stomach churning and heart pounding. '_Why is this guy making me so nervous?_' I tried to reason. '_Usually I'm not so un-professional…_' I took a deep, shaky breath before speaking again. "I'm here to help you." Maybe it was just me, but I thought I saw his eyes widen just a fraction of an inch. When he didn't respond, I continued. "With your Heroin addiction." Letting the words slip past my lips was always a tough part for me, usually they got angry whenever I mentioned their addiction. He just seemed to sit there, his lips parted slightly, staring at me intensely. "D-don't act like you don't know. I was sent here by…"

"I'm not playing dumb." He whispered, looking away. I closed my mouth, set down my pad and pencil and folded my hands in my lap. "And I really don't want to know who you were sent by. You work for the NPA, correct?" I nodded solemnly. "But… may I ask a question, Ratio-san?" I nodded again, silent. "Why would they send a child to help me?" '_Damn it. I knew this was coming. Everybody always asks the same question._' I stood up, taking my items in hand.

"I'm not a child." I said forcefully, trying to sound intimidating. "I'm nine-teen years old, and who cares if I'm a little young? If I wasn't qualified, they wouldn't have hired me, you know." He looked back up at me, and stood up himself. I watched, confused, as he extended his hand toward me. "Wh-what are you doing?" I asked. He just smiled a little, and put out his hand more. I took it reluctantly.

"I like people like you, Raito-san." He instructed me to sit back down, and I did so, extremely confused. '_What the hell is this guy doing? Was this some kind of test or something?_' He sat back down after watching me, and curled up in the same position. This time he began to chew on the nail of his thumb, and I leaned back slightly. "You're strong-willed, I appreciate that. You really like what you do, don't you?"

"No!" I answered all too quickly. '_Shit. I probably just fell into another one of his traps, didn't I?_'

"Stop lying, I can see that you do." I shifted awkwardly again. I had heard rumors that the man before me was a genius, the smartest person alive, things like that… but I never expected him to see right through me like that. It was like he had known me since I was born, been with me every moment of my entire life. '_I guess he really is a genius…_' "Like I said. You like what you do, don't you?"

"I guess." I answered numbly. "It's not… you know, selfish or anything, it's just… I like helping people, I like making the wo…" I stopped mid-sentence, not wanting him to hear my true thoughts about what I did. He gave me a look that suggested 'go on', and I couldn't do anything but comply. "…I like making the world a better place. Th-that's what I say, I guess it's not really true…"

"No, I can see where you're going with that. If I were in your position, I would likely think that, too." I picked up my pad and pencil and placed the tip delicately on the paper.

"We need to get started, I can't necessarily just sit here all day, talking."

"But you want to, don't you?"

"No!" I answered too quickly again. He shrugged and stood up, stretching. As he stretched, his shirt slid up slightly, and I was shocked by how thin he _really_ was. I could see just a tiny bit of his ribs stick out, but what I did see made me worried for him. "But we need to get start…"

"Actually, if you'll excuse me… I need to go to the restroom." I sighed loudly. '_If this was anyone else, I would believe him… it seems like he's just making up excuses to get out of talking to me._' I watched him walk off without another word, and I was left in silence as I heard a door close and lock. I dumped my pad and pencil on the coffee table in front of me angrily. There was no way I was going to make any headway with this man; I could already feel it deep inside of me. I settled back uneasily on the couch and looked around.

After several minutes of Elle being gone, I began to grow angry. '_What the hell is taking him so long?_' I thought, crossing my arms. I looked back over my shoulder at the spiral staircase, and I thought I heard… children laughing, but I ignored it. The laughter grew louder and louder until I heard feet running down the stairs. Suddenly something flew over my head at a dangerous speed, and I ducked just in time. It hit a bookcase in front of me, and as I looked up I noticed it was a soccer ball. The running got louder until two people rushed into the room. All talking ceased at that point.

"Sorry, did we hit you?" One of them asked. He spoke in English and had a lower voice. I turned around to see who had almost killed me. Two boys stood behind the couch, both looking about thirteen or fourteen. They both had platinum blonde hair and pale skin, and the same intense eyes as him.

"N-no." I stuttered, standing up.

"Could you hand that to us?" The smaller boy spoke up. He was dressed all in white, and had curly, short hair. The other was contrary, dressed all in black with bone-straight, long hair. I walked over to the soccer ball and tossed it back to them. I was about to sit back down when the one dressed in black asked:

"Are you one of his dealers?" My eyes widened, and I looked back at them, shocked. '_These children know about him?_' Slowly, I shook my head no, and they exchanged a look of relief. "Then who are you?" He tossed the soccer ball up and down lightly. "By the way, I'm Mihael. This is Nate." He gestured to the other child, who rarely spoke.

"I'm Yagami Light. I'm…" I stopped, wondering whether or not I should tell them who I was and why I was there. I sighed, figuring it couldn't hurt. If they already knew about his addiction, what was the harm in telling them I was there to help? "…I'm here to help Elle." They exchanged glances again, and Mihael dropped the ball.

"Help him?" Nate said, stepping forward. I backed up a little bit. "You mean with his drug problem?" Mihael looked away when he said that, almost as if he was ashamed.

"Y-yeah, I work for the NPA." He walked right past me to pick up a couple books that had gotten knocked over when the soccer ball had slammed into the bookcase. "What… relation do you have to Elle?"

"We're his children." Mihael said, and seeing the shocked look on my face, back peddled. "I mean, not his _actual_ children, we're adopted. He adopted us." I stayed silent. "So you're really gonna help him?" I nodded slowly, watching the expression on his face change from one of caution to one of… almost gratefulness. He opened his mouth to say something, but Nate cut him off.

"There's no way you'll be able to help him."

"Wh-why?" I asked, watching him stand up.

"Because," He twirled a strand of blonde hair around his finger. "He's been doing this for years, as long as we can remember. And he's had us for a long time. Even someone with such good intentions as yours, still… he's just too far gone right now." My heart sunk, and I had a feeling the child was right. Those were my first thoughts when I had my phone conversation with him only several days before.

"Is he in the bathroom?" Nate continued. I nodded, wondering where he was going with this. "He's not… _really_ in the bathroom." Suddenly everything clicked, and I knew what he was going to say next. "Well… I mean, he's in the bathroom, but… you know what he's doing, right?" I stayed silent, somewhat astonished that those children knew so much. Nate sighed, and brushed himself off. "He's injecting himself." My heart skipped a beat, but he continued. "He gets one-hundred-and-fifty milligrams a day, every day."

"C'mon, man. You don't know if this guy can help Elle or not, that's no way to talk." I was glad Mihael stood up for me, but I thought he was wrong. More or less, I agreed with Nate. He seemed to make the most sense. It really didn't look like I was going to be able to help him.

Just then, I heard a door open and a few seconds after, Elle walked into the room. He must have been in there for twenty minutes! He stopped when he saw Mihael and Nate. "What are you two doing in here? You weren't bothering Light, were you?" They shook their heads, and Mihael picked up the soccer ball again. Elle placed his hands on their heads. "What did I tell you about playing soccer in the house? Go on." They scurried off, Nate giving me a glance over his shoulder as he left.

I looked at him, and my temper flared dangerously. I strode over to him and looked him straight in the eyes, glaring. He seemed taken aback for a few seconds, then his expression settled back into the strange calm mask that was seriously pissing me off. "What were you doing in there?!" I shouted. His eyes darted to the hallway where his "children" had run off down.

"What did they tell you?"

"I don't care, Goddammit! _What_ were you _doing_?!" He stayed silent, and I grabbed him by the collar. "Were you fucking shooting up?!" He didn't answer again, and I shook him. "Were you?! Don't you have the _sense_ not to do that while I'm in the house?!"

He sighed, and removed my hands from his shirt. When I looked into his eyes, I could see a roaring fire burning behind them. I tried to get away, but he held me close to him. "Get out." He whispered, shoving me backwards. I stumbled a few steps, but caught myself before I fell.

"Wh-what…" I stopped, staring at him. He stepped forward quietly, and my heart skipped a beat again. "N-no… I… I could have you arrested, you know…" Not five seconds after the words escaped my lips, I was thrown backward as his fist connected with my nose. I landed hard on my back; I could already feel warm blood running down my face. "You son of a--!" I started, but he cut me off.

"I told you to get out." Without another word, he pulled me up by my arm and led me to the door. '_Is he serious?_' I thought as he unlocked the door. "Go." He gave me a push and I stumbled outside, but not before getting a good look at his face before he shut the door in mine. He looked… worried.

It took a while of staring at his front door before I felt the warm blood drip onto my shirt. I rolled up my sleeve and wiped my mouth and nose, stunned. '_Did he really just punch me and throw me out of his house?_' I thought, wiping the blood away from my face again. Figuring there was no way he would let me in again, I climbed into my car and began to drive away. Keeping my eyes on the road, I was able to not think of what had just happened for a short period of time. But after five minutes, they began to creep their way back into my head. '_There's no way I'll be able to help him if he's stupid enough to shoot up while I'm in the next room. Jesus… how much did that kid say he takes every day? One hundred and fifty milligrams? Shit, that's a lot…_' I shook my head, trying to scatter the thoughts away. I tried not to think about the people unless I was with them.

That's what had fucked everything up in the first place, after all.

Author's Note: WOW. That…was…AMAZING!! So fun to do. :D I'm not giving up Death Note Cell for this, don't worry… lol. Actually, putting Mello and Near in was a last-minute decision, so forgive me if their part seems a little… different. The only thing I'm not happy about is how L came out. It may be just me, but I think he seems a little OOC. I like Light, though! He's always fun! XD Anyway, sorry for my extensive lack of knowledge of drugs. Or… just… how things work in general, but… yeah. That's me. This actually sprung from a single thought last night: I was sitting on my bed, just thinking… and all of a sudden I thought: "I wonder if L's on crack or something like that. He looks like he'd be strung out on drugs." And then this came forth. I couldn't stop thinking about it at all! This took me so little time to write. Is it just me, or is the language a little more extensive in this than in the others? "Fuck" is used gratuitously, you can tell that. That's like my new favorite word. XD AAAANNNNYWAY, I hope everyone looks forward to the new chapter soon. (And don't worry; the wait is not going to be too much longer on DN Cell chapter 8, either.) BYE!!


	2. Chapter 2

Title: The Cleaner (Five hundred points for whoever guesses where I got that name

Title: The Cleaner (Five hundred points for whoever guesses where I got that name. And _don't_ read the disclaimer, cause that's cheating! D:)

Rating (of d00m!): Well… actually, I probably should be more serious about this, but… it's going to be rated M. For… obvious reasons once you read the warnings. Or… just open up the story for that matter, cause it starts out with that shit. :D

Authors Note: ALL RIGHTY THEN!! –Has watched too many Jim Carrey Movies- It's been a long time coming, but chapter two of The Cleaner is finally up! Mind you I still hate that goddamn show, I just think the title's nifty. :D It's been killing me that I know oh so very little about drugs, but… I really can't do anything about it, can I? I'll just have to be my regular, uneducated self. Which all of you love anyway, so… yeah. XD I actually consider this story a bit of a break from DN Cell, as I just got finished writing Chapter 8. –Phew- That's a lot of freakin' words, you know? Yikes. By the way, has anyone heard the song "Love Me Dead" by Ludo? If you have, CONGRADULATIONS!! Because that song is Amazing. With a capital "A". There are several videos of LxLight with that song, and I think it fits them so much! But a lot of people think Light tops in that song. Is it just me, or do you think L should top? Hmm… I just picture it that way. But that could be just me and my twisted self, so whatever. I… really shouldn't talk that much, but I feel like talking. –Hyper- I had a weird dream last night. It started out with Light getting hit in the back of the head. Poor Light… oh well. So he passes out, and then somebody comes along and picks him up. But his body is still on the ground! It's like they picked up his soul in a way. And they start talking and stuff, but I don't remember what they were talking about. The woman that picked him up was dressed all in white, and she had white hair and was really pale. I think she was an angel or something. But the funky part? Throughout the whole thing… Light didn't have a shirt on. Which I really don't mind, but it still struck me as just a little odd. And nobody said anything about it either! He was just walking around shirtless and nobody cared! Oh well… I have strange dreams, people. Strange… dreams…

Summary: They call me "The Cleaner", but you'll never hear it come from my mouth. They call me a God, but I don't believe them. They call me a child, but I'll never listen. They call me names, but they don't hurt. He calls me in the middle of the night, and I let myself cry.

Pairings: LxLight, like usual. You know, I really shouldn't have to put anything here anymore. I should just say: "The Usual." And then every one of you guys should know what I'm talking about. D:

Disclaimer: All right, if you're reading this just because you want to figure out where I got the title from, just because you want 500 points… _SHAME ON YOU!!_ –hits you with broom- Heh…heh. Anyway, if you haven't guessed, I got the title from this new show that's on here. (I don't know if it's on anywhere else in the world… but… I'm in America, and I know it's on there.) It's called… tadah, "The Cleaner", and it's odd that I would choose the title, because… I. HATE. THAT. DAMN. SHOW. It's sooo stupid, and I can't stand to be in the same room with it. D: But… I guess I stole more than the title, because what Light does in this story is basically what the guy does in that story. Enjoy? D: (Also, I feel like a total jackass again for not actually saying this: I DON'T OWN DEATH NOTE!! And I'm not affiliated with it in any way… so don't sue me, okay? Okay.)

All right, this… is going to be kind of suckish, because I know absolutely NOTHING about drugs. I don't know if Heroin is illegal in Japan, but… I'm guessing it is. I just spent the last forty-five minutes on Wikipedia looking at an article about Heroin. Yeah… really sad, I know. Well… at least I know a little more now. A little. Anyway, this story is from Light's POV, and it's going to be written as each day that Light is with him. If you're wondering: Why the hell are you calling him "Elle", it's because in this story, it's AU… and I wanted him to have a semi-normal name, okay? Okay.

Anyway, because the summary is MAJOR confusing, here's what this is about: Light Yagami is 19, and he works for the NPA. They call him "The Cleaner", because of his job. What does he do? He helps people overcome their addictions. After finishing a rather nasty case ending in suicide, he is called to help a young detective named Elle Lawliet with his addiction to Heroin. (Elle is pronounced like "L") At first meeting they don't get along, but that changes over the course of their month together. They both help each other in some strange way.

Okay, I know this is the second chapter and I don't usually do warnings, but… nevertheless, I have some anyway.

1. THERE IS YAOI.

2. THERE IS YAOI. (I know I said it twice… I like yaoi… XD)

3. Light touches himself. (XD I can't believe I just said that! LOLZ! Just read…)

4. Actually, that's all I can think of right now. :D have fun!

XxX

(August 10, 2008)

Chapter 2

I sat in my car outside my apartment building for a while, just thinking things over. Maybe I had gone too far in accusing him of shooting up in the bathroom? Or maybe I hadn't… I wasn't really sure, all I _was_ sure about was that I was extremely pissed off at him and never wanted to see him alive again, let alone see him the next day. My nose had stopped bleeding a little while back, but it still hurt and felt strange when I breathed through it. I ran my hands through my hair, sighing heavily. "He's impossible." I said out loud to the empty car. "I just can't deal with him." Silence was my answer from the invisible audience that surrounded me. "And nobody cares…" I groaned, yanking my keys out of the ignition. I headed off at a slow, dejected pace to my room, hoping to just go to bed and forget about him.

Once inside, I turned on every light I could find. I hated dark. Resting my head against the wall, I looked at my watch. 4:03 PM. '_Only four o'clock? Feels later than that…_' I felt myself sliding down the wall, but I really didn't care. I needed to get work done anyway, who care's where it's done? I hit the floor especially hard, and winced at the pain in my shoulder from where he had grabbed me. I thought about him, about why he was so difficult. Sure, a lot of the people weren't exactly happy to see me, and I was sure he was no different, but he _was_… something about him made him different from everybody else I had ever seen. Maybe it was the way he looked. Not his overall appearance, but the way he brushed everything off with such a cold, deadened front. '_I could help him…_' I thought absentmindedly, but then regretted it. "No." I said out loud. "You don't like this guy. You never will, and you _especially_ don't want to get involved with him…"

I took out my pad and pencil and started to write down my observations on him so far. _1. At first appearance, seems relatively normal. But once I began talking with him, he seemed less and less interested in the things I had to say. Does not connect well with the world around him. Might be fault of the drugs, but I doubt it. 2. Angered easily. Watch OUT!_ I underlined it twice for good measure. No need getting punched in the face again, was there? As I looked at the paper, the blue lines began to weave in and out of each other. Was I just tired, or did he hit me harder than I thought? I leaned my head back and closed my eyes, thinking that maybe if I slept for half an hour or so it would do me some good and take my mind off of him.

Still, he was the last thing that ran through my head before I fell asleep…

XxXxXxX

My eyes snapped open and I sat up with a jolt. That was how I usually woke up, so it wasn't a big surprise. I looked around, having to remember that I had slept on the floor before I got up. I pushed myself up from the ground, sore. I heard a soft 'thud' behind me, and I turned around to see my pencil and pad lying there. I bent over and picked them up, looking over my notes. "Fuck him." I said out loud to myself. Annoyed, I tossed the paper onto my dining room table. As I walked into the bedroom, preparing to sleep the remainder of my time I had allotted myself in there, I looked at my watch. My eyes widened when I saw that over three hours had passed since I first got home. "I guess I slept more than I thought…" I shook my head, wondering why I had lost so much track of time.

Once I reached my bedroom, I turned off all the lights. Call me contrary, but I can't have any lights on when I sleep, it bugs the crap out of me. I sat on the edge of the bed for a while, thinking over what to do with him. "I could easily just give up on him…" I mused quietly to myself. But I had never given up on _anybody_, no matter how difficult they were. I wasn't to let what good reputation I had go down the drain over him. "So what if he thinks he's bad ass?" I asked. "I'll show him. The little asshole."

Much to my surprise, I found my head was still in a little bit of a fog. Idly, I wondered why I was having such a hard time thinking clearly. In the end, I just decided to go back to sleep. I was tired, anyway. I pulled my shirt over my head, yanked back the covers and settled my head against the pillow. Five seconds later, I felt something jabbing me in the hip. I sat up, wondering what the hell I had in my pocket that was so uncomfortable. I dug around until I found my cell phone, which was vibrating softly. I looked at the caller ID, a number I didn't really recognize at that moment. Still lacking my presence of mind, I flipped it open anyway. "Hello?" I asked, trying to wipe all traces of sleepiness from my voice.

A cool, low voice answered on the other end. "Yagami-san?" I almost dropped my phone when I heard him speak. '_Why the hell is he calling?! Didn't he just throw me out of his house?_' Nevertheless, I tried to compose myself and answer before I made him any angrier.

"Yeah… E-Elle… What is it?" There was a silence on the other end, and for a second I thought I could hear Nate and Mihael in the background. They were nice kids, and I felt bad for them that they had to be forced into the nasty world that drugs got their father into. "Elle, are you there?"

"Yes. I'm here." Silence again. He must have been holding the phone close, because I could hear the gentle exhale of his breath through his lips. I listened, prepared to do anything if he wanted me to. I didn't know _why_ I would do anything… I just knew I would. Finally, "I wanted to apologize to you." My jaw nearly dropped. Apologize? I had never expected that word to come from his mouth. He didn't seem like the one to apologize willingly, and the fact that he was shocked me a little. "It was unnecessary," He continued. "And rude of me to lose my temper like that." I cut in.

"No, it's my fault!" I blurted before I got a chance to think of what I was going to say. "I… I mean… well, yeah. It is my fault. I shouldn't have accused you of shooting up in the bathroom. You probably weren't doing that, and it was wrong of me—"

"I was." Was his simple answer. I stopped, and had to think before I realized that he had admitted to injecting himself in the bathroom. "Did you hear me? I was." A strained tone appeared in the back of his voice, but vanished as quick as it had come. "I… I hadn't had any since the night before and I didn't think I could have made it five more minutes. I know you don't understand me, but…"

"I do." The words slipped past my mouth once again before I wanted them to. My heart gave a little leap and skipped a beat when I realized what I had just said to him. There was silence, and I prayed that maybe he didn't hear me. All of a sudden, I heard a click and an electronic voice blasted in my ear: "Your call has ended. Call time: 1:05. To call back, press 1. To…" I snapped my phone shut and threw it on the night table beside me. "Damn it!" I shouted, watching it tumble onto the floor with a hard thud. "Damn it, why did I say that?!" I fisted my fingers through my hair, wishing for any type of way to know why I was so messed up around him. "Fuck… no one's supposed to know…" I mumbled, burying my face in my hands.

My phone began to vibrate again softly, but with how worried I was and all… I didn't hear it.

XxXxXxX

Soon enough I fell back into a worried sleep, thoughts of why I had said what I did crawling their way through my subconscious. It didn't last long though, and I woke up with another jolt. It took my eyes a few seconds to adjust to the total darkness that surrounded me. I wrapped my arms around my bare shoulders, feeling cold but knowing that I didn't have a good reason to. When I felt my hands beginning to shake, I took them away and placed them palm up in front of my eyes. They trembled slightly, and I balled them into fists to stop the shaking. I heard my phone vibrating quietly again against the carpet, and I reached over and picked it up. It was hard to see the caller ID in the darkness, but somehow I knew who it was… "What the hell do you want?" I said angrily, flipping it open. I hoped he heard me.

"What do I want?" Was the cool reply against my ear. It was almost like he was right there next to me, and a shiver ran through me. "I thought I told you the last time I called. Forty-five minutes ago." I swallowed. "I've been trying to get in touch with you, but you weren't answering, and I…" I cut him off, unable to take any more.

"Why the fuck did you hang up?!" I shouted as loud as I could. Silence clouded the phone line for some time, so much so that I thought he might have hung up again. "Why did you…" I tried again, my voice weak. "Why did you hang up on me?"

I heard him take a deep breath on the other end, then let it out softly. "To be honest, I was scared." The words that slipped past his lips made me more confused than anything I had ever heard him say. '_Scared?_' I thought, my head spinning. '_He doesn't seem like the type of guy to get scared easily…_' "Yagami-san? Are you still there?"

"Why are you calling me that?" I said the first thing that came to my mind after it had been wiped blank by his words. "I told you. You can call me Raito."

A pause, as if he was gathering his thoughts. "I figured since we're not exactly on good terms with each other anymore, it would only be appropriate."

"Fine." I answered shortly. "Then I should—"

"No, Elle is fine for me. It would sound awkward any other way." He answered before I even had time to ask my question. I sat for a moment, captivated by the sound of his smooth voice next to my ear. "Anyway, that's not what I wanted to say. I want to see you again." My heart skipped a beat, and for a second I didn't know what to say back. "You wouldn't mind coming over tomorrow, would you? Or is that what you're supposed to do…whether I want you to or not?"

"Y-yeah…" I mumbled, the connection between my brain and my mouth completely severed. "Yeah, I'll come over tomorrow."

"Good." He replied simply. "I'll see you tomorrow then, Yagami-san?"

"Uh-huh." I nodded, but remembered he couldn't see me over the phone. I could tell he was about to hang up, but I called after him. "Wait! Don't hang up!" The words tumbled forth from my mouth, and sounded much more desperate than I had intended. Silence, then my answer.

"What is it?"

I took a deep breath. "Please call me something different, Elle."

A sigh, and then: "All right then…"

"Well?" I pushed, impatient.

"How about 'Raito-kun?'"

XxXxXxX

_His hands hold me firmly in place while his lips move over every inch of my uncovered skin. A surge of warmth runs through my lower abdomen every time he brings his head down to softly brush his pale lips over my stomach, chest, and any place he desires… I tilt my head back into the pillow and groan as he moves up to kiss my neck. He pushes his lips roughly against the sensitive skin, biting softly every time he feels like making me squirm. I wrap my arms around his back, losing myself to whatever he is doing at the moment. The sensations he is creating within me are much greater than any I had ever brought on by myself. I dig my nails into his back. _

"_Something the matter?" He asks softly, sitting up. My hands fall from him as I look into his cold blue eyes. When I don't answer, he moves down to crush his lips against mine, his tongue trailing gently over them. I squeeze my eyes shut, wrapping my arms back around him and kissing him also, pushing my head forward. His lips moving against mine almost make me forget where I am or what is happening. I just melt into his arms, feeling extremely limp, and a little more than just turned on. He moves away from my mouth and breathes softly into my ear, sending another pleasant surge of warmth through me. I moan just a little, and he breathes: "I guess that means 'no', huh?" He climbs off of me, and this gives me the exact opportunity I want._

_I push him backwards onto the bed playfully, sitting on top of him. I place my legs on either side of his hips, straddling him. At first he looks less than pleased, but I begin to rock my hips roughly against his, simulating the motion that would be going on if we had been having sex. He twists his head to the side, pale lips parting slightly. His eyes flutter closed, and a quiet groan escapes his open mouth. Not only is it doing wonders for him, it doesn't feel half bad on my part either. I look down, watching myself grind my hips against his. A bigger surge of warmth runs through me, making me bite my lip. When he turns his head back toward me and opens his eyes, I smile coyly and begin to slowly run my hands over my body. _

_He arches his brow, and a slight smirk plays at the corners of his lips. I try to mimic the movements he had been doing earlier, pinching my skin lightly in some places, and just barely brushing my fingertips over others. It adds to the sensations a tiny bit, but I am more embarrassed to be touching myself in front of him then just aroused. I brush my palm lightly over my chest, rubbing my thumb across my nipple. I jump slightly at the feeling it produces, and he places his hands on my hips, keeping me still. I close my eyes as I explore my own body a little more, just in case he is still looking at me. It's embarrassing; I don't want him staring at me! _

_I become so carried away, I hardly register that he begins to undo my belt, finally undoing my pants and zipper. I stop, pushing his hands away and climbing off of him. This time he takes advantage of it, and shoves me roughly back against the bed. "Not so controlling now, are you?" He growls deep in his throat, and I blush. Looks like he's going to get me back… He leans down to kiss me, biting my already bruised lips slightly. It hurts, but it also feels good… He yanks down my pants and boxers while distracting me with his mouth. I grin when I see him sit up and toss my clothes to the side. He leans back on his heels, sitting much like he did the first time I saw him, and takes off his shirt. _

_I survey his body surreptitiously. He's as pale there as anywhere else, with a flat chest and prominent ribs. He has a very long torso, almost delicate in a way. He crawls seductively back over towards me and lifts my legs around his hips. Kissing me again, he presses our bare chests together. I feel his hand began to explore my body again, creeping down my back and a bit lower… Suddenly he pulls away and gets off me completely, sitting back on his heels again. His eyes trail down the length of my frame, and I blush even deeper when he smiles at me. "That thing you were doing earlier." He says offhandedly, as if we weren't really in the bedroom ready to have sex. _

"_Wh-what thing?" I find that I still _can_ talk, despite my current lightheadedness. _

"_You were touching yourself." My face falls into a deeper shade of red as he says those words. '_Is he asking me to do what I think he is?_' I think to myself, swallowing. "Do it again. I want to watch. Only this time, go further…" Even though it's as embarrassing as hell, I have no other choice but to comply. I can't look into those beautiful eyes and say no… He grins and begins to chew on his thumb as I slide my hand down my body…_

I sat up with a jolt and slight shriek, more wide-awake than I had been in ages. I quickly looked around my room, thinking I might find him sitting on my bed like he had been two seconds ago. My eyes darted around frantically, but no sign of him. "God_dammit_, that did _not_ just happen!" I shouted, furious with myself. Waking up from a dream like that was embarrassing enough, but waking up from a dream like that with Elle Lawliet was just plain humiliating. My face got even redder when I realized that my pajama bottoms were a little tighter than they should be in a certain place… I ran my hands through my hair, and sighed. "Come on, Raito. You don't like him… It's just all these pent up hormones or whatever…" I muttered to myself quietly. I turned to look at the clock on the night table beside my bed, and it said: 5:32 AM. '_Crap. Now I'm wide-awake, horny, _and_ it's early. Great._' I thought.

I lay back down, pulling the covers over my head. "It's way to early for this…" I muttered angrily, burying my face into the pillow. Though no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get his face out of my mind…

XxXxXxX

(August 11, 2008)

"So, Elle…" I started, nervous. "I guess we can talk here. Though I'd prefer someplace a bit more private. These _are_ confidential matters, you know." He nodded.

"I know. And if anyone hears anything, I only have myself to blame. Though I really just wanted to talk to you." I blushed, but tried to conceal it. "I don't get out that much," He continued, smiling faintly. "So it's a nice change of pace, really." His eyes trailed around the quiet coffee shop he had invited me to just a mere hour before.

_A loud vibrating woke me up suddenly from the troubled sleep I had fallen into, after that most inappropriate dream. Sleepily, I reached out from under the covers and grabbed my irritating cell phone, flipping it open. "Hello?" I groaned, sitting up. _

"_Raito-kun, did I wake you up? I'm sorry." I nearly jumped out of my skin as his cool voice permeated the air around me. _

"_N-no!" I sputtered, trying to sound as awake as I possibly could. "No, I was already up…" He chuckled lightheartedly._

"_You're a terrible liar, Raito-kun. I'm sorry. Go back to sleep. I'll call you back later…" I sighed. '_Why the hell is he so into apologies all of a sudden? It's like he has to apologize for everything he freakin' does…_' _

"_No, honestly. It's okay. I'm awake now… what did you want?" There was a silence on the other end for a while before he spoke up again. _

"…_How would you like to have breakfast with me this morning?" My heart skipped a couple beats. No, make that a couple hundred. "Does that sound okay? Or am I scaring you?" He laughed quietly. _

_I opened my mouth to speak, but I couldn't find any words for a couple seconds. "I'd love to." Somewhere in the back of my mind, I didn't know what I was saying to him, only that I was getting myself into a situation that I _really_ didn't want to be in. "Why?" I asked, hoping he had a good enough answer._

"_No reason. Just thought it would help me to get to know you better. If you're going to be helping me through this, I think I out to know you… don't you think so? We can both get to know each other, if you want If… that's what you do. I don't really know. You seem personable." _

"_Yeah… I-I guess. Where do you want to meet… and… and when?" _

After only a few seconds of mimicking the way I sat, Elle finally gave in and brought his thin legs up, pressing them against his wiry chest. I noticed he was wearing the same thing as he had the last time I had seen him. Which had only been the other day. His perfect eyes landed on my face for a fraction of a second, and then he answered: "Nate and Mihael are at school." I opened my mouth, but found no words once again. He answered a question I hadn't even begun to ask! "Just incase you wanted to know. I may be a drug addict, but I'm not a bad parent. I do my part to keep them safe." He paused, sighing loudly. "They're my life. I don't know what I would do if I lost them…" I turned my eyes away from him. It had been hard enough to look at him the first day, but ever since that dream, it was even more difficult.

"All right. Since… I really didn't get a chance to ask you any questions yesterday, we're a day behind." I said absentmindedly, bringing out my faithful pad and pencil. My notes from the afternoon before stared back at me, and I flipped over a new sheet, annoyed.

"A day behind?" He repeated, sounding confused.

Despite how much I hated it, I looked back up at him. His softly prominent features captivated me in some strange way. He _was_ attractive; there was no denying it. Well, if you could see his face under that strange mop of hair. He didn't look Japanese, but his name told you that, anyway. Aside from his eyes—which were the most dominating feature on his face—he had a long, thin nose and high, almost effeminate cheekbones. His lips were a soft pink, pale… like the rest of him. They were thin, but not so much that it was ugly. He had a small mouth, and an even smaller jaw, and a sharp chin. If I hadn't finished looking over his face, I would have forgotten to answer. "Y-yeah." I stuttered. "A day behind. Usually, I spend a month with each client. Longer if I have to, but I usually don't have to spend longer." He nodded.

"I understand. Sorry for upsetting your schedule." I shook my head.

"Uh-uh. It's okay, really. Can't tell you how many times this has happened…" I trailed off slowly, my eyes somewhere distant and my mind even farther away. I rested my chin in the palm of my hand, thinking… letting my mind wander. I always knew when I took my own path in my head where it was going to end up. It was like a one-way street that I didn't recognize until I got to its final destination. '_Haruaki…_' I thought silently to myself, completely unaware of Elle sitting across the table. I jumped when I felt cold fingers tap me gently on the side of my face. I turned my head toward Elle, who looked worried sick, sitting there with his hand outstretched toward me in an attempt to jolt me out of my daydream. "I'm sorry…" Tumbled from my lips, sounding a lot more dejected than I had planned.

"It's okay. I do that sometimes, too." He tried to smile and pass off his worry, but it didn't work. An awkward silence fell over us, until Elle finally spoke up. "Raito-kun? Can I ask you something?"

"Yeah." I said. "Shoot."

He paused, casting his eyes up toward me. With the intense gaze that stopped everything around us, I knew it something important. "Who… is Haruaki?"

Author's Note: DUDE!! I'M SO SAD!! For some goddamn reason, I felt like crying every time I went to work on this MF! Is it just me, or is this chapter sad? I don't think it is… I know it's kind of pointless and all, nothing really happens… but it shows a little deepening of the relationship between Light and Elle. And I also wanted to put a naughty dream scene in, just for the hell of it. LOLZ! Who here knew that L was perverted enough to want to watch Light touch himself? –Raises hand- I DID!! Of course he is… XD.

ANYWAY. Oooh… who's Haruaki? Sounds freakin' mysterious if you ask me. But don't ask me. Because, likely, I'll accidentally tell you a giant spoiler. But… remember how I was talking about Amazing songs in my first author's note? I found another one! (Which I think might account for my sadness, but that's another matter entirely.) It's called "Almost Lovers", and it's by "A Fine Frenzy." That song fits Light and L completely! And it's very melancholy. Listen to it and you'll cry… seriously. I also spent about half the day on YouTube, watching every clip I could get my hands on of Mello's English Dubbed voice. I –hearts- it! I don't know why, it's just to die for! Maybe because it sounds so much like the voice I use when I do an RP with him in it. (Yes, my voice can go that low. No, don't ask…) Near's voice pisses me off, though. I agree with the fact that they picked a girl for him, but I still think it shouldn't sound so childish. And… more clear… it might just be me, but something about the clearness of his voice is off. It's not scratchy, but it's not clear, either. Can't really describe it. Just listen to it, and maybe you'll know what I'm talking about? OH, and one more thing.

Light's English laugh in the last episode is EPIC WIN. Go listen to it. Now. Because you will laugh your ass off right along with him. It's just… full of everything needed to win you an Internet. The only thing I hate… is that, at one certain point during his trademark Lunatic Laugh, he… hmm… how do I put this gently?

He frickin' squeaks.

No, I'm not joking. It's like someone let the air out of one of those weirdly tied animal balloons at a birthday party. He hits like… a high Z. (Yes, I know that's not a note, but… when you hear how high he goes, it becomes one. Trust me.) I'm a girl, and I can't even go that high. That should be, like… illegal. I'm serious. But OTHER THAN THAT, his laugh is the best evil laugh I have ever heard. Truly insane. His "That's right. I am Kira." Afterwards doesn't really do it for me, but the rest of the episode does. Brad Swaille wins five Internets for his Amazing performance. They picked the perfect guy, no joke.

Anyway, before I ramble on too much more… have fun, and look forward to chapter three of this, and chapter nine of DN Cell, soon enough. I also came up with an idea for a new story that I'm kind of tossing around in my head right now. It has promise, but I'm not sure if I'll do it. A lot of kinks to work out before I can put it out on the drawing board. Okay… BYE!!


	3. Chapter 3

Title: The Cleaner (Five hundred points for whoever guesses where I got that name

Title: The Cleaner (Five hundred points for whoever guesses where I got that name. And _don't_ read the disclaimer, cause that's cheating! D:)

Rating (of d00m!): Well… actually, I probably should be more serious about this, but… it's going to be rated M. For… obvious reasons once you read the warnings. Or… just open up the story for that matter, cause it starts out with that shit. :D

Authors Note:-Happy- HELLO!! –gives everyone a giant hug and a virtual cookie- You guys caught me in a good mood today! (Even though I had a SHITLOAD of homework to do, but… that's another matter, that I won't get into just yet. :D) I finished all of it though! Well… I still have to study again for that one test, but… never mind that. ANYWAY. Chapter 3 of The Cleaner, people! W00t! (My God it's been ages since I used that stupid word…) I came up with a great, sort of funny idea for a cover for The Cleaner. Although, since the story does ring a more serious note, it could be like… a back cover or something. My friend Z suggested something rather cute, and I might take that into consideration and draw _two_ pictures instead of just one. I drew a doodle of what it's going to look like in my notebook at school today. (When I was totally supposed to be paying attention, but whatever. I still got all the notes I needed!) Anyway, Z asked me "How come your chapters of The Cleaner are so long?" Hmm… they are? I really didn't notice. Maybe I should make them shorter? Or have DN Cell's chapters be longer? I'm not sure. Feedback, people!

-Hands everyone another cookie- I wish they could be real, but we _are_ over the Internet, sadly. Lol. If I ever meet any of you in real life, I'll be sure to bring cookies.

Summary: They call me "The Cleaner", but you'll never hear it come from my mouth. They call me a God, but I don't believe them. They call me a child, but I'll never listen. They call me names, but they don't hurt. He calls me in the middle of the night, and I let myself cry.

Pairings: LxLight, like usual. You know, I really shouldn't have to put anything here anymore. I should just say: "The Usual." And then every one of you guys should know what I'm talking about. D:

Disclaimer: All right, if you're reading this just because you want to figure out where I got the title from, just because you want 500 points… _SHAME ON YOU!!_ –hits you with broom- Heh…heh. Anyway, if you haven't guessed, I got the title from this new show that's on here. (I don't know if it's on anywhere else in the world… but… I'm in America, and I know it's on there.) It's called… tadah, "The Cleaner", and it's odd that I would choose the title, because… I. HATE. THAT. DAMN. SHOW. It's sooo stupid, and I can't stand to be in the same room with it. D: But… I guess I stole more than the title, because what Light does in this story is basically what the guy does in that story. Enjoy? D: (Also, I feel like a total jackass again for not actually saying this: I DON'T OWN DEATH NOTE!! And I'm not affiliated with it in any way… so don't sue me, okay? Okay.)

XxX

(August 11, 2008)

I felt my heart stop. Although in reality it only skipped one beat, it still felt like I was going to die. All the blood rushed to my cheeks, and I wondered if there was a way—any way—to get myself out of the deep, dark hole I had just dug myself into. '_Okay…_' I thought, '_I _know_ I didn't say his name out loud. Or… or did I? Fuck, I don't remember!_' "He's a client!" I shouted, not able to control the volume of my voice, or the shaking of my hands. I looked back up at him, albeit reluctantly. His eyes were soft, yet calculating. His face really didn't have any emotion, the look of his that I was getting to know more and more each day. There was something hidden behind it, though. "He's… just… a client…" I gasped, putting my head in my hands. I didn't want to notice the stares of the people whose conversations had stopped because of my outburst.

I was shocked when he said, "You're lying… aren't you?" I dug my fingers through my hair. '_Damn it, why does he have to make _everything_a question?! Why can't he just leave me alone?!_' In the distance, I heard his chair screech and the soft 'clack' of his shoes as he stood up. I looked back up. Everybody had stopped talking; the coffee shop had gone deadly quiet. Elle leaned over me with an intensity that frightened me somewhat. His now cold eyes bored into mine as he said harshly, "Tell me."

I couldn't take any more. I stood up, slammed my hands down on the table and shouted, "_Just leave me the __**fuck**__ alone!!_" Before making a mad dash toward the door. I couldn't stand to be in there one more second. It was the most humiliating situation of my life. Before I had gotten one step out the doorway, he called back after me.

"I can't leave you alone if we're working together, you know!" I balled my fists in frustration, feeling so embarrassed I wanted to cry. But I didn't, forcing the angry tears back into the recesses of my mind. I stormed away, not caring where I was going or what was going to happen next. All I knew was that I couldn't be near him. It was impossible. '_He should've just left well enough alone!_' I thought, furious. The sidewalk became a blur under my feet as the tears I had tried so desperately to control slipped past my boundaries. I brushed them away with the back of my hand, training my mind anywhere but him. People passed by me, and I could feel their stares at my back, but I forced myself to keep walking.

I knew where I was going, but I didn't know where I was going… all at the same time. In the long run, I knew where I was going to end up. But right then? I didn't have a clue. '_If only I hadn't let myself think about him. I haven't thought about him for almost six months! There's no reason to think of him now._' I sighed, stopping in the middle of the sidewalk. '_I have no reasons to do anything…_'

XxXxXxX

_Satou Haruaki._

_December 3__rd__, 1989 to June 14__th__, 2008._

_Beloved son and friend._

"_Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation."_

That was only the second time I had read his tomb stone engraving. The first was shortly after his death, where I would spend every waking hour thinking about him. Especially how it wasn't fair the way he died. Suicide. What a horrible way to go. To take your own life… didn't it prove you were nothing more than a coward? Haruaki wasn't a coward. I knew him… He wouldn't have done that, but the evidence was all too clear. Just like it was that I needed to get him out of my head. But Elle bringing it up again had done nothing to help me.

I felt cold all of a sudden, even though there was no wind and it was perfectly warm outside. I wrapped my arms around my shoulders, shivering. Closing my eyes, images of him floated around in my head. He was average looking, but I saw him as much more. I always had… Much like Elle, his eyes were the most prominent part of his face. They glistened when he was happy, and had a certain sparkle when he was being mischievous. He had untidy brown hair (but it was always covered by that stupid cap he wore) and darker skin than I. Maybe that was one of the reasons I was so upset. Elle reminded me so much of him. It hurt inside a little every time I saw him… just the memories flowing back. Haruaki had a certain cold air about him, like he was always hiding something from you. Maybe it was that festering sadness that drove him to cocaine, and then… suicide. I never knew what had caused it.

He was just a young, troubled man. Much like myself, but I won't get into details just yet. When I first met him, he said he couldn't quit. That it was impossible. He said cocaine had become such a natural part of his life it was like breathing. But no matter how long he protested or how much doubt he put into himself, I wouldn't let him give up. We became quick friends, even though we were complete opposites. He listened to rap, dressed strange, and hung out with a terrible crowd. Though, he was a completely different person around me. He was kinder, more gentle…

And I would never forget the day he told me he loved me. I felt the tears start to fall again, and I didn't see any good in stopping them. Wasn't it healthy to mourn over the loss of a loved one? That… was what I was doing, wasn't it? I whispered his name to myself, wishing to God he could have been there to save me. And that I could have been there to save him, as well… So lost was I in my own world that until he grabbed my shoulder, I didn't hear him. "Raito-kun. Thank God. I knew I would find you here…" I immediately stepped away from him, wrenching my shoulder from his grasp.

"Get away from me! Don't touch me!" His eyes softened as he looked into mine. "I hate you!" I spat angrily, thinking then that I meant every word. "I hate you! Why did you do that?!"

He sighed, and took a few steps toward me. "You're creating a scene. Perhaps we should go somewhere a little more secluded?"

I felt anger burning up inside of me, turning my face red and making my mind cloud. "_This is a fucking __**cemetery**__!!_" I panted, shaking. "How much more secluded can you _get?!_" I allowed him to step forward even more, seemingly unfazed. I realized the tears were still slipping over my cheeks. I pressed my fists against my eyes, hoping the last strands of control that were keeping me together didn't snap. I felt him place a gentle hand on my back and push me forward. I was shocked when I fell against his chest, my head on his shoulder. He enfolded his arms around me and pulled me close to him. Too upset to speak, I just let him hold me against his surprisingly warm body. He rubbed my shoulder soothingly, and before long the tears stopped coming at all.

"I hate it when people lie." He finally said after several minutes of being silent. I looked up toward him and he looked down, but did not smile. "So that's an explanation for losing my temper. I apologize. Pushing the issue was out of the question. I see now." I cast away my eyes and let his comforting embrace wash away all my anger. I never thought I would be in his arms… Hell, I never thought I would be in _anyone_ arms again after I had lost him.

"See what?" I half whispered, half mouthed. Somehow he heard me, and answered.

Elle took a long breath before speaking. "I see why you are so devoted to helping me. And… helping others, in general. You told me earlier… yesterday, that you liked your job. I thought I heard something behind your voice that mentioned otherwise. Was he really just a client?" There was a great silence, as I decided whether to answer him or not. Luckily he continued to speak. "Or did you love him? It seems like that. I've… never seen another person look so lost."

I pressed my face into his chest and took a shuddering breath. "Y-yeah…" I hiccupped, wiping my eyes again. "Yeah… I loved him. I… I loved him a lot." His fingers tightened around my shoulders momentarily, and then relaxed again. "And… I miss him…" I looked up and saw him nod, an understanding gaze passing over his face. Did he know? He couldn't… "You don't understand…" I tried to pull away from him, but I was trapped in his embrace. "How could you possibly understand? You've… you've never… l-lost… anyone…" It didn't make any sense. He could've, I just didn't know. Maybe that was the reason he was so cold to everything around him?

He ran his fingers through my hair, and I flinched. Now he was touching me? I shivered a little, not quite used to being touched by someone else. "You're right." He sighed. "I probably don't understand… And I don't blame you for getting upset." I closed my eyes against the gentle touch of his fingertips. It felt better than I had expected… Suddenly, he stopped. I opened my eyes, and he lifted my chin up gently. I looked into his eyes for what seemed like the longest time, but it was really only a few seconds. Elle leaned down and pressed his warm lips to my forehead gently, and I felt all the blood in my body run to my face. He lifted his head back up and gave me a slight smile, and then pushed the hair out of my eyes.

Finally he released his grip around me, and I stumbled forward. Placing my hand on my forehead, I was aware of a certain lightheadedness that filled my frame. I looked back at him standing behind me, simple and calm… but also complicated and unstable… '_Did that just really happen?_' I thought to myself, stunned. '_Am I… am I really falling for him?_' I shook my head slightly. Placing one foot slowly in front of the other, I began to walk away. No idea where I was going, but I needed to get away from him. Being in his arms had awakened something inside of me that I wasn't ready to deal with. "I-I'm sorry…" I sputtered. "I… I need to… I need to go." He nodded, and I tried to walk away.

But I couldn't. My legs trembled underneath me, but they wouldn't move. It was like something was making me stay… I turned around to face him, ready to admit to my weakness. "M-maybe…" I started, my voice hoarse. "…Maybe I could stay… for today…" He nodded, pleased. In a few seconds, he was by my side. I felt him intertwine his fingers with my own, but this time I didn't mind as much. A familiar pang of guilt coursed through my veins, but not as bad…

XxXxXxX

"What got you into using Heroin?" The words slipped past my lips as they had countless times before. We had gone back to his house after leaving the cemetery some time ago. The feeling that something had been brought forth inside of me had long past, and now I was feeling awkward and embarrassed around him. I could hardly look into his eyes. He placed his chin in his hand and his dark eyes looked off somewhere else. Maybe seeing something I couldn't see? After a while, he simply shrugged. "You don't know?" I asked, thoroughly confused. He nodded. "How can you not know? There has to be a reason… go ahead."

He paused. "I told you. I don't know. I just… started, that's all." His words were curt, harsher than they way he had been speaking before. It led me to believe he was hiding something, but I would figure that out later. I shrugged also, and made myself a note, wondering if I could find out from any of the people at the NPA why he wasn't telling the truth. "What's next?" He asked, a bored tone edging his smooth voice.

I sighed. "Well… first, I want to get something out of the way." He looked more alert as I started speaking. "You know what's going to happen… once I'm done, don't you?" A long pause, and then, to my surprise… he nodded. He was the first person that actually understood the path they were heading down. "Okay." I said, smoothing the back of my hair. "What's going to happen?"

He was silent for a few seconds before answering. "I'm going to jail, correct?" I shook my head.

"No. Probably not. I mean, since you're a detective and all… the most likely thing is you're going to a Rehabilitation Center. You'll spend three or four months there, and then… well, I don't handle the rest. You'll probably be clean from there. As long as you don't go back, that is…" He stayed silent, understanding better than anyone I had ever dealt with before. Haruaki had put up quite a fight when he found out that he might go to jail. '_Maybe that's why… No. Don't think about it._'

"Raito-kun. Are you okay?" I looked back up at him. Was all that sincerity that he showed me false? I hoped to God it was. There was no way in Hell that I would ever let myself be with him, let alone be with anyone ever again. Haruaki was the only person for me, and now that he was gone… who else was there? Certainly not him. I nodded sharply, tossing the thoughts away from the front of my mind. "All right. Just asking." I wanted to scream at him. It was driving me crazy… how could he be sitting there talking to me like this after what happened at the cemetery? It didn't make any sense! Didn't he have any regard for my emotions or what _I_ was feeling?

"A-anyway…" I stuttered, trying desperately to refocus my mind on the subject at hand. "So… you really don't know why you started?" He shook his head again, and I thought I saw something flicker behind those cold eyes. Sadness? Or maybe my eyes were playing tricks on me. I shrugged. It's not like it hadn't happened before. Although, people usually had a reason for starting. A death in the family, bad home life… even abuse. "Okay… Have you ever tried to quit before?" To my surprise, he nodded.

"Yes. I have." His eyes trailed down for a second, and then met mine again with a force only he could hold. "Once before, about a year ago." I placed the tip of my pencil on the paper, interested. "I was clean for a couple of months, but…" He sighed, closing his eyes. Was it just me, or did it look like he was remembering something? "…I guess I was too much of a coward to force myself to keep going…" I bit my lower lip. What could I say? "But that's all behind me now, isn't it? And this time I'm really going to quit." He flashed me a quiet smile, but then his face fell back to what it usually was.

I swallowed loudly, unsure of myself. "You're not a coward." I finally said, looking up at him. I folded my legs underneath me uncomfortably. "If anyone in this room is a coward, it's me." His eyes widened a fraction of an inch, and he stared at me disbelievingly. I hated turning the conversation toward myself, but it seemed the only way to bring him out of his self-pity. I expected him to say nothing, but instead he asked a question.

"Why do you say that?" His voice was quiet, as if speaking too loud would scare my delicate answer away. "To work like you do… you couldn't possibly be a coward. I could never do what you do. I would have given up years ago." I made a noise of agreement just so he would be silent, but he continued. "Why do you think you're a coward, Raito-kun?"

I closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose. Was he really asking this? '_How in the Hell do I answer this…?_' I could feel my heart beating wildly in my chest, so loud I was afraid he would hear me. "There's lot's of reasons, but they don't concern you…" I looked back up to see him nod in agreement. At least he had the sense not to ask anymore. I let out my pent up breath in a loud _whoosh_, my hands shaking slightly. I placed them in my lap calmly, wondering why I was so damn scared. "I'm proud of you for quitting on your own." I said, looking away. "Most people wouldn't do that. They… they would just wait for someone else to come along and do the work for them. But you…" I took a deep breath. "You realize you have a problem, don't you?" He nodded solemnly.

"Yes. I do. I wish it didn't happen, but my life took a turn I couldn't necessarily control." He closed his eyes tightly and pushed his fists into them. After a few seconds, he buried his face in his hands. "Damn it…" I heard him mutter.

I blinked a few times, thoroughly confused. "Hey… that's more than I can say for most of the people that I've worked with. Especially Haruaki, he—" I stopped when I realized his name had slipped from my lips. I had made a vow not to talk about him, and that was the second time I had broken it… "Well, I can't talk about it." I brushed the hair out of my eyes, wishing I hadn't as I felt them begin to water. Elle looked back up, seemingly composed again. "Feeling better?" I asked quietly, hoping it was the right question.

"Yes. Sorry for that." I shook my head, dismissing it as nothing. He pressed his knees closer against his chest, and I watched him with a strange fascination. "So how are we going to do this?" I didn't say anything, not quite sure what he was getting at. He went on, oblivious to my confusion. "To be honest, I'd like to quit tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?!" I blurted, shocked. "What… do you mean at once?" He nodded a silent 'yes'. "You can't do that!" I said, wondering how someone as evidently brilliant as him could come up with something like that. His eyes changed from pleasantly calm, to genuinely confused. Almost as much as I was. "I-I… I mean… where did you get such an outrageous idea?" After a few moments, he didn't answer… just looked at me like I really didn't know what I was talking about. "You have to go slowly, trust me. If… if you just… just quit, you'll be in living Hell. I'm not joking, Elle…" He nodded.

"You don't think I know? You're a bit naïve, aren't you?" I didn't say anything, a little hurt. "That's how I quit before. I decided one day that I shouldn't do this anymore and just quit. It wasn't easy, but—"

I held out my hand toward him. "And look where _that_ got you?! You're back at square one, and because of that you're sitting here with me!" I crossed my arms over chest and turned my eyes away, flustered and angry. My hands were shaking again… had they ever stopped? I didn't know. I dug my fingers into my arm, feeling the fabric of my shirt under my nails.

He narrowed his eyes. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say you know a bit more than you let on, Raito-kun." My heart skipped a beat and I felt my blood run cold. Had I said too much? No… I was always careful, there's no way I could've underestimated anything. "Are you speaking from personal experience, maybe?" Blood rushed to my face, and I felt the pressure of angry tears burning behind my eyes. "I'm not prying. You don't have to answer. I'm just suggesting that if you want to keep things like that secret, maybe you should do a better job."

I stood up on shaky legs that didn't feel my own and gathered my things. "I-I-I'm sorry…" I sputtered, clenching and unclenching my fists. "I… I… I have t-to go…" And soon after the words had passed my lips the door was closing behind me, and I was leaving the man that understood me more than anyone I had ever known. But that was what scared me…

He understood me _too_ much.

Author's Note: HOT DAMN!! Light's secrets are finally revealed! (Well, one of them… but who's counting, nyeh?) And… and Light and Elle have their sort of… first kiss… kind of. So he kisses his forehead, but whatever. Who cares? It's still lips to skin, it freakin' counts!

Anyway, moving on. You don't know how much it killed me inside to do this chapter. I'm actually, like… _really_ sick right now, so… yeah. Not fun. D: I stayed home from school today, cause I got like one hour of sleep last night. No joke. I was sooo sick, it wasn't even funny. I have… let's see… cramps in my stomach, extreme nausea, a migraine, and a fever. And my jaw hurts like nobody's freakin' business. So now you all know how important this is to me, to get my updates on time to my fans. :D –happy nao-

Next: Haha, I'm such a nerd. I just figured something out the other day. FTW? Guess what it means. –waits- YAH I KNOW!! It means "For the Win". I totally thought it was "Fuck the What" but you didn't hear that from me. I got it from my friend, who said that's what she thought it was, too. HAY. Does anyone here read "Loveless"? Cause I've been like… addicted to it lately. I stopped reading it a _while_ ago, like a year ago… and I'm thinking maybe I should start again. I think I left off on like, volume four or something. I don't remember. I found volume two yesterday and I was like: OMG I REMEMBER THIS!! And I started obsessively reading it. :D

THAT REMINDS ME. I had a friend, who said she had started reading Loveless a while back. And… for those of you that don't know, Loveless is a Shounen-ai manga. She was rambling on and on about how much she loves it, but I remembered something while she was talking. She was the _very same girl_ that came up to me and said: "Ewww… you're reading a Shounen-ai manga? Those are stupid." I wanted to start laughing, but I contained it. Still, it was precious.

Ah, I think I better cut this short. :D don't really have the energy to type any more. Gonna take a nap, yo. See ya! 8D


	4. Chapter 4

Author's Note: HAAAAAAAYYY! Guess what I busted my ass doing this weekend? NOTHING. Muwahahaha! No, I'm just joking. I actually did something. I had to write a two-page summary of a book I'm reading currently, but it only took me half an hour. –shifty eyes- What, I do things fast. The only thing I don't do fast is update. Really.

But anyway, guess what I did? I killed myself trying to build an EXACT replica of the Task Force Headquarters in the Sims 2. Do you know how much custom content I had to download? A BUTTLOAD. That's right. A buttload. That's more than a shitload, because the shitload comes OUT of the buttload. 8D (That… was really weird, right? Right.) But guess what else? On October 15 _and_ 16, they're showing both Death Note movies at the movie theater I usually go to! –extremely happy- But it's on a Wednesday and a Thursday, so I might not be able to go. Damn. Why will I not be able to? Cause they're school nights, and my parents vociferously refuse for me to go ANYWHERE on school nights. God, they're like dictators… -cough-

OTHER THAN THAT. Err… not much, really. I'm working my ass off on the Halloween Special so it can be good for you guys. I've always wanted to do something like this. So far I've gone through two ideas. One was fluffy, one was depressing, and this one is supernatural AND depressing! 8D it's like a whole package! (No fluff, though… sorry. You know I don't do that all the time.)

All right. So you guys can actually read the story, Imma stop talking now. Bai! (Well, I'll see you at the end of the chapter. Can you believe this is number 4 already? WOW.)

Chapter 4

(August 12th, 2008)

I couldn't cry anymore, but the nervousness and guilt was doing nothing but eating me from the inside. I hadn't even called him, but it was obvious he didn't want me to. Taking advantage of my emotions and then saying something he _knew_ would make me leave… who the Hell did this guy think he was? Drying my eyes for the hundredth time that morning, I felt my cell phone vibrating against my leg. I dug into my pocket angrily, thinking it might be Elle, but… it was my boss from the NPA instead. '_Should I let it go to voice mail?_' I wondered, not really wanting to talk to anyone right at that moment.

I didn't have the time to decide, as the screen on my cell phone flashed 'Missed Call: NPA'. Sitting it back on the night stand, I lay back down. Somewhere inside of me I wished I could talk to Elle again, but I knew that it wouldn't be happening any time soon. But, even more than that, I wished I could speak with Haruaki again. He… wouldn't know what to do, but he would know how to comfort me just so, and make everything so much better. Haruaki was—without a single doubt—the best man I had ever known, regardless of drugs or no drugs.

A tear slipped down my cheek, and I was surprised that I had any left to cry. I wiped it away, though I knew one could see me. It still hurt, nonetheless. I hated crying, though I did it so often. It made me feel like I was less important when I did it, but I had done a lot of things that made me feel that way…

I decided to think of other things besides the mistakes I had made in the past. '_What am I going to do about Elle's intake…?_' I thought, turning on my side. '_It needs to be lowered gradually, but he wants to do it all at once! That moron, that can't possibly work… I won't allow anyone to do it like that… not anymore…_' No. I stopped. That was what had gotten me in that mess in the first place, wasn't it? Looking at my phone once again, I was surprised to find the screen flashing: 'Elle'. Without thinking, I grabbed it off the table and flipped it open violently. "It was awful rude of you to run away like that yesterday…" His cool voice met my ears, making my face turn red. Why was he always so calm around me? Even when I had seen him 'lose his temper', he was still cold as ice! What was _with_ that man? "Well, Raito?" I flinched. "Did you hear me?" Was… he angry with me?

"It's your fault!" I said harshly. God, did I sound like a little kid! I could hear him laugh on the other end, and my face reddened even more. I truly wondered if he was angry with me or not. I only expected him to be, but then he should have expected _me_ to be also! Saying something like that to me. It made my blood run cold…

"Now… how is it my fault?" I hated the way he talked to me! Like he was talking to a child. A stupid child, at that. One that needed to reprimanded. Oh, what I would've given to strike him across the face right then. Regardless of what I was thinking at the moment, he continued on coldly. "As far as I can see, it was all a simple misunderstanding." He paused, and I wondered if I should say something back. "On your part, of course." I stopped everything. It seemed like I even stopped breathing for a moment, but I can't tell what for, now. I'll probably never understand why his words affected me the way they often did when he said something.

Slowly, everything came back to me, and fury rose within my chest in little waves. "That's just downright rude!" I spat out, clutching the phone tightly between my clenched fingers. "You go and say something like that, which could _not_ be misunderstood, and then you say it's my goddamn fault?! What the Hell is wrong with you, Elle!" There was silence for a few moments on the other end, as he probably thought of something smart to say. I glared at the blank wall in front of me, trying to calm myself down a little, lest I explode.

"How could I say something that's unable to misunderstand, when you misunderstood it? Either that or you're just not very smart, are you?" I felt my face grow redder than before. Somewhere inside of me wished he was in front of me so I could hit him. Hit him hard, too. "I think you're just a little on edge, Raito. That's all. Go to sleep for a little while or something, and then call me back when you've calmed down a little bit, okay?" I had just about had it with him treating me like some little child. He pretended to have my well-being in mind, but it was so condescending, you wondered if he really cared at all. I thought of him holding me in his arms back in the cemetery, and I felt like hitting him even more. He was heartless, wasn't he? A terrible man.

"No. I'm not going to do anything you say, Elle. You know why? Because you treat me like I'm a fucking child, that's why!" I put my head in my hands and turned to bury my face in the pillow. I didn't want to talk to him—I didn't want to work with him anymore. Fuck my reputation; I just wanted to give up. I felt my throat tightening again, but I refused to let myself cry anymore. I swallowed the painful lump back, but I still felt tears coming on. "I'm not a child! It's not your fucking place! If anything, I should be telling _you_ that! You're the goddamn drug-addict!" I didn't mean to say it, I really didn't. It just escaped my lips, but I felt… strangely happy as it left my mouth. If that didn't put him in his place, then nothing ever would. "I'm not the one that needs help to get their life back on track!"

"Sounds like you're describing yourself, Raito."

I dropped the phone, my hands shaking and panic rising deep in my chest. It turned me cold, as I wondered 'H-how the fuck does he know… how…? No, h-he can't know… he's just trying to mess with me…' "_No!!_" I shouted with all my might into the phone. "No, I'm talking about _you!!_ You don't know the first goddamn thing about me!" Silently, I willed myself to stop acting so defensive. Wasn't it just giving him ideas that I was lying, anyway? I gripped it back into my hand and felt like throwing it across the room, I was so angry. "You don't… just… stop thinking like you know everything in my life, okay? You don't!"

"Au contraire, sadly enough. Forgive me, but I did a little research on you." My heart throbbed gently in my chest, everything seeming to slow down around me. 'M-my life is over… I can't believe it… he knows. He knows now. N-nobody's supposed to know…' "Methamphetamine when you were just thirteen years old, hmm?" I felt my throat constrict, and I placed my hand over my mouth as a wave of panic and nausea washed over my body. "But you didn't do it that long. Only six months. You quit all by yourself, did you? Incredible, I feel a bit proud of—"

"_No, stop it!!_" I shouted, coming unglued for the first time when I was speaking to him. "Stop reading it!! Stop reading the fucking paper, just stop!" The lump in my throat had returned in full force, and I honestly just wanted to crawl away and die somewhere, alone. I squeezed the pillow tightly to my chest, fingernails digging into the soft fabric. "Just… wh-why do you do this to me…? A-all I'm trying to do is help… that's what I'm here for… I never did anything to you, Elle! Wh-what the fuck did I do?!" I cried, closing my eyes tightly.

"You refuse to cooperate with me." He said harshly, voice colder than ice as it ran down my spine. "And you also refuse to acknowledge that I wield much more power than you realize, Raito. I could have you put in prison, you know…" I jumped, realizing he was using my very words against me. "But it already says that you might anyway." His voice was a deep calm, contrasting my heaving gasps as I lay on the bed, not knowing what more to do than shake. I wanted to scream at him to leave me alone, I wanted to slam the phone down and go over to his house and beat the shit out of him, I wanted to do something, _anything_, but I was so helpless then. "So… you're doing this position instead of serving a little time in prison, hmm? Interesting…" But above it all, I refused to cry. I had cried so much lately, I didn't want to anymore. I wasn't going to let myself… but it seemed so tempting right then.

"P-please…" I spluttered finally, my voice already thick with the tears that were threatening to fall. "Please stop, Elle…"

"Then you'll cooperate?" He asked, all-too-eager for my reply. I nodded, forgetting that we were on the phone. "Well, Raito? Will you?"

I sighed, my breath shaky and loud against my ears. "Y-yes… I'll cooperate. It's childish of me… being like this… I should know better."

"Now, I don't mean for you to lose your self-esteem, Raito. Just work with me. It's true that I need your help. But I can't do that with you hating me, can I? Although I'm pretty sure you hate me even more now, though… huh?" He sighed also, and I could visualize him on the other end of the phone, dark eyes narrowed in concentration and possibly even anger. "It doesn't matter, anyhow. All that matters is that I have your concentration and—"

"Then what was that all about in the cemetery?!" I shouted involuntarily, the thought just springing into my mind. Why _had_ he acted that way toward me in the cemetery, then in such a short amount of time turn around and say that he didn't care about me? "You acted like you cared! Were you lying? Were you just putting me on?" There was silence on the other end, and I was happy that I had finally rendered Elle speechless. "I thought you actually liked me for a moment!" Oh, no. That… wasn't supposed to come out. That was supposed to stay in!

He exhaled loudly, and I could hear the phone being set down for a moment. There was silence after that, and I wondered if he was going to come back and say something, or if I should just hang up. Suddenly a loud crash burst against my ear, and I dropped the phone. "Fuck!" I shouted, holding my ear. I gingerly picked it back up, as if something else was going to happen. Which, Hell, I didn't know. I waited for him to say something, anything, and I wondered if he'd been hurt or not.

"_I did it because you were upset!_" Elle shouted loud into the receiver, making me jump. "_Is that such a crime?! To want to help __**you**__ when you need help?!_" I stayed quiet, shocked. Never before had I heard him shout, never before had I known he could even _get _this angry about anything. "_You! You of all people should understand what it's like to want to help someone! Someone who needed help!_" I closed my eyes, wondering if he really viewed me as that desperate. "_If anything! That should mean that I care!"_

I turned to look at the ceiling, wondering why I even bothered with this man anymore. By far the most challenging person I had ever had to deal with. "…I apologize." He said finally, voice a little hoarse. "Yelling was not the right thing to do, and it was cruel. I—I've never lost my temper like that before…" I opened my mouth to speak, maybe even to comfort him, but he kept talking. "That… was uncalled for, please accept my apology." I almost felt like saying 'no', just to spite him. But a feeble 'yes' passed through my lips, nonetheless. "So you accept it? I… thought you would be furious." To tell the truth, I didn't know why I _wasn't_ furious.

It was like all the sadness and anger toward him had been washed away the moment I heard him scream. I still felt the humiliation inside from when he had read the paper, but… I wasn't angry. It didn't make any sense. I should be angry, I should want to kill him—and then kill him again! But I didn't. All I wanted to do was sit and listen to him, maybe even talk some more a little. "…You didn't know how pathetic you looked, in that cemetery. I just wanted to make everything better for you—"

"Why do you like me?" It just fell from my lips. I had no idea why on Earth I said it, but from the way Elle was talking, it sounded like he had feelings for me. "I—I've only known you for not even four days, Elle. You can't possibly—"

He sighed. "I don't recall saying I had feelings for you, Raito." I felt my face growing hotter; had it ever returned back to its normal temperature? "I don't remember saying that at all, really." He continued smoothly, making me lose my train of thought all over again for a moment. "Just because I wanted to help you to not cry anymore, doesn't mean that I have feelings for you, Raito. That's ridiculous." I shivered, not liking where this was going. '_But… h-how could he say that? How could he blatantly lie like that to me?_'

"But you kissed me!" I said, a little louder than I had intended. I wonder what happened when he had screamed at me. I wanted to see and hear that side of him again—but another part of me didn't. "You did!" I continued on, as if he had refuted what I had screamed. "Right there in the cemetery! You held me in your arms and then you kissed me!" I don't really know if I said this to elicit an action out of him, I really think I just said it because I had nothing else to say at that moment. But I could tell that it hurt him nevertheless. A strong silence permeated the other line of the phone, and I wondered if I should say something else. But something in the back of my mind told me I had said more than enough already.

"I kissed your forehead, Raito." He uttered, passive and cold; collected like he almost always was. "I really don't think that constitutes or falls under the category of a 'kiss'." My heart sunk. Maybe… he was right. Was I just making a big deal out of nothing? I mean, it wasn't like he had done anything more. Just a simple kiss on the forehead, like to a small child. But I wouldn't be the one to lose this fight. A kiss was a kiss, no matter where. "Don't you have anything to say? Aren't you going to refute me?" He asked challengingly, almost completely over his outburst from earlier. But I could still tell he was angry.

"I don't care, Elle!" I shot back, just wanting for once to prove him wrong at something. _Anything_. "A kiss is a kiss, you jackass! No matter what, no matter _where_!" I figured that would set him straight, but of course he just came back and beat me down again. "I can't have relationships with clients! It got me in trouble the last time, it's bad! You don't understand, do you?!" Sooner or later I would have to realize that to win, I would have to be calm like he was. Losing my temper was going to get me nowhere, no matter how much it had in the past. Elle was different, he didn't seem to see me as other people had.

"All right, enough of this childish bickering." He said finally, after a long pause of listening to me catch my panting breaths. "If you want to believe that I kissed you, go right on ahead. However, let me make this clear, Raito. I have no feelings for you. I never have—and chances are—I most likely never will. I understand that having relationships with your clients is against the rules, so… let's put out the flame before it turns into the fire, hm?" I swear to God I could feel my heart breaking, then. Never before had a person been so cold in telling me off. Sure, I had heard people screaming at me, the whole 'it's over' shit, you know. But… he said it like I didn't even matter to him. Something made me believe it, too.

"M-mm-hm." I barely was able to talk, and my eyes darted to the phone. 22:32, it read. I had been talking for a relatively long time. "…I'm sorry, Elle. I need to go. I—I'll be over there in a few minutes, all right? Then… maybe we can talk some more." Without waiting for his response, I pushed the "end call" button and headed over to his house, somewhat prepared to make the worst mistake of my whole life.

(_Break_)

I stared up at the ceiling, wondering what in all the circles of Hell possessed me to do what I had just done. Or, rather _who_ I had just done. I put my face in my hands hand held back a scream of frustration. '_What's going on…? What the fuck is happening to me…? I don't understand… somebody help…'_ All of a sudden, I felt a cold, heavy hand on my shoulder. I turned to face him. "E-Elle…" I said, my voice a little hoarse. I forced a weak smile, also forcing my eyes not to look at his shirtless form. _And_ forcing my mind not to think of his naked form, which I had seen just minutes before. "H-how are you…?" was all I could say.

_I stood knocking impatiently on the door, ringing the door bell several times in a row for good measure. 'Fucking open the goddamn door…' I thought angrily, wondering if he was just behind the door, waiting until I got pissed off enough, and then open it. But my suspicions were cleared when the door swung open to reveal him standing, looking very confused. "I thought you weren't coming today. I figured since we had that argument at all, that you wouldn't—" I silenced him by crushing my lips against his own._

_At first, Elle stumbled back a bit, but no way in Hell was I releasing my grip on him. Funny enough, he didn't try to pry me away as I had expected. He just kept backing up, until he bumped into a wall behind him and I bumped into his chest. I kept kissing, not caring if he was kissing back or not. I could feel those blue eyes staring at me, burning holes through my skull. I placed both hands on his chest, and broke way for air, waiting for him to say something to me. All he did was stare, really. His mouth was slightly open, and I could feel his warm breath on my face. His expression hadn't changed much from when I had opened the door—still a strange placid mask. _

"_What…" He finally whispered, looking at me, and looking around like he wasn't quite sure where he was. "…was that…?" His dark blue eyes finally fell back to me, and he tilted his head softly to the side, black locks falling over his eyes. He took my wrists gently and removed them from his chest, placing them back down by my sides. I realized I was breathing fast and hard, and decided to take his shock to my advantage. I leaned in again and kissed him forcefully, sucking on his lower lip. He jerked a little, apparently realizing he couldn't back up anymore._

"_That…" I breathed, as I drew away. "Was a real kiss." _

Elle sighed. "I'm fine, Raito." He droned, probably not even looking at me. "Albeit a little tired, but fine. How are you?" What were we, just having casual conversation? I could barely take it anymore. I was aching to say something meaningful.

"…_I…" He swallowed, for once looking down. "I realize that, Raito. Why did you…" He made a strange face, contrary of what it usually looked like. His upper lip pulled back in something of a cross between a snarl and a look of disgust. "…Why did you kiss me?" I reached out and turned his face back toward me, afraid that I really didn't have an answer to that question just yet. Maybe I would, in time. Closing my eyes, I deftly pressed our lips together again. He still refused to kiss me back, so I was left with doing all the work. It felt like a one-sided battle, only I didn't know what was going to happen. I felt two hands on my waist, and for some reason, I was happy that he might be getting into it. Or he was going to push me away, either one. But when they stayed there, thumbs lightly tracing up and down my sides, I was confident that I wasn't going to get shoved away. _

_Slowly but surely, Elle Lawliet began to kiss me back._

"Good. Glad you're fine." I mumbled incoherently, turning away.

There was a dead, stifling silence for a moment before Elle spoke again. "We need to talk, Raito." I cringed. '_I don't wanna fucking talk to you, leave me the Hell alone!' _

"Sure. What do you want to talk about?"

_It was soon enough that the both of us had to break for air. I could tell Elle hadn't kissed many people in his life, I was sure that I was close to his first one. But nonetheless, feeling that mans lips against my own was the strangest, yet most wonderful sensation. Better than a thousand kisses from anyone else I had ever been with. Well, most everyone else. I stared hard into his eyes, not wanting to back down. Looking away from that man was like a challenge, or saying you were too weak to do otherwise. He would pounce; attack you with all he was worth then. Somehow I guess I felt like I had to prove myself to him before I could do anything else. "That was…" I whispered, not sure what I should finish the sentence with. My bad? Great? Hot? A terrible mistake that I'll regret for the rest of my life? Of course I didn't know that yet… _

"…_Enthralling." Elle finished my sentence for me, tilting my chin up to meet his intense gaze more head on. "Absolutely. Enthralling." The corner of his lips turned up into a small smile—at least I'm guessing that what it was—and before I could say anything back, he was kissing me again, tangling his hands in my hair and making me lose all presence of mind. His mouth moved awkwardly against my own, and I wondered if it had felt that way to him when I had been kissing him the first time. Somehow he ended up pushing me close against him, chest to chest, lips to lips and forehead to forehead. Our breaths mingled together each time we broke away—which was rare. _

_Suddenly I was pulled back by the firm grip he had on my hair, and I grimaced. It wasn't that painful, but it sure as Hell wasn't gentle, either. "Wh-what?" I stammered, remembering to look him in the eye. He seemed much more serious then, and my heart gave a little jump._

"_What the Hell are we doing?" He asked, a look that I had not seen before on his face. Was he genuinely… confused? His brow drew together, and he looked somewhere over my shoulder. "Huh? What is this? What… what are we…" His voice trailed off, and I really couldn't bring myself to answer._

"Well, like I said before. What the Hell are we doing, Raito?" My heart jumped again. Why did he expect me to have an answer? "I mean… for Christ's sake, we just had sex." Out of the corner of his eye, I saw him put his face into his hands. Half of me wanted to reach out and comfort him; the other half just wanted to run for the door. I decided to stay there, but not comfort him. Sort of half and half, if you could even call it that. "I thought you had mentioned you weren't allowed to have relationships with your clients."

"Then this isn't a relationship!" I blurted out before I knew what I was saying. He looked toward me, with an inquisitive expression. "This is just… just a… a thing. Y'know, you've had those before. Just… something on the… side…" I stopped talking, a blush spreading over my cheeks.

"I thought you would've considered yourself above that… Raito."

Author's note: OH. MY. FUCKING. GOD. I am _soooooo_ sorry that this took such an ass-breakingly long amount of time to write. It's just… well… I've been like, super busy… and… yeah. Souhhh… I guess you guys kinda want to kill me by now, huh? D: But don't. Because if you do, there won't be any more Cleaner. And you know what _this means?_ I have to go work on Death Note Cell now. Which upsets me, because I have absolutely no idea what I will do for chapter 11. I'm thinking they freaking need to go to sleep by now. Because… ten chapters for not even a whole day? No wonder my teacher called me a freakin' over achiever. I am. Butbutbut… it's not my fault. I just like to make my things good for you guys. So you'll keep coming back and reading them. :)

But ANYWAY. GUESS WUT I HAD TO DO. Which… I'm pretty much sure it's nothing compared to what some of my older fans have to go through, butuhhh… here we go. Our teacher gave us a six page research paper to do on any main figure in WWII, and it was due on November 21st. I thought—okay, I'll have enough time for this. Later, our science teacher gives us a big-ass project to work on. It's worth a freaking exam grade. I think—okay, I'll have enough time for this. Even later (mind you I have started on none of this) our homeroom teacher—who is also our reading teacher—gives us a book project that's due on NOVEMBER 20th. The science project is also due on the 21st. Once again, I think to myself—okay, I'll have enough time for this.

NOVEMBER 20th and I am busting my ass off at 6:00 at night trying to get all those motherfucker's done. I have a six page research paper that I swear to God I managed to do in fifteen minutes, a science project (that I got 100 percent on) that I bullshitted in about ten, and a book project that took the rest of the time. I… believe I got good grades on all of them, because I have a way of putting my mind to something at the last second. Like The Cleaner for example. I typed most of this on November 24th. Most of it. The rest… if you look close enough, was done… in October. Because… I'm a terrible slacker. And now you know. D:

Nevertheless, be patient for the next installment of Death Note Cell, because I really have no ideas. DD:


	5. Chapter two Special COME READ!

Author's note: All right. Found the greatest thing on the face of the earth, people. So I was messing around with that weird Babblefish thing, right? The one that translates pages for you and all that crap. SO. I was messing around, and I translated something from English to Japanese. It came back with all the weird characters, so I translate _that_ back to English.

Comes back the most screwed up thing I have ever heard. PERFECT. ENGRISH. Perfect, people, perfect. So I got this idea. I copied the whole dream scene from chapter two, and did that. This… is what it came back with. Enjoy, darlings.

That hand is installed while moving to all inches of skin where that lip is taken my cover, me, you grasp securely. As for the surge of the warmth passing by the abdomen where I am lower he that head quietly him…My stomach which desires, on the box and the place to use the brush on that thin lip when he moves in order again to kiss to my neck in the pillow and groan voice my head it can tilt me who move to the degree which it decreases in order simultaneously. He generally pushes that lip in the degree which the air where he would like to struggle in me vis-à-vis the sensitive skin which is bitten quietly does. As for me as for those which he now has done around that it turns back my arm with anything, loses to by his. The feeling which he draws up among me rather than me having with by his is greatly large. I dig my nail that.

"Something problem?". He asks quietly, sits down. When the blue eye where my hand me that is cool from him it examines it falls simultaneously. When I do not answer, that lip in order to crush, he lowers that tongue which drags calmly to those vis-à-vis my ones. I squeeze, turn back my arm around that, and kiss in him and have tightened, my eye my head is pushed first. That lip which moves vis-à-vis my ones in most me I am somewhere or something happens, you make forget. As for me being attached by that arm which you are moved very by softly exactly by many exactly a little dissolving. He moves from my mouth, breathes quietly in my ear which sends the surge whose another feeling of the warmth is good through me. Depending upon me it comes exactly a little, he breathes: "As for me even `no' [haatsu]?". As for him who presumes thing my rising, as for this the strict opportunity which I want in me is given.

I acting playfully in the bed, push him in the rear, sit down on that. I put in place my foot of that hip on whichever side, stride him. First as for him happiness it is done, when at times little seeing, as for me generally starts shaking my hip vis-à-vis that and we possess characteristic, the movement which is continued is imitated. That head is twisted in the thin lip where he divides the side, barely. And quiet roaring voice escapes that eye the mouth which was opened closing due to the [bi] coming. That only wonder for that half has done either one state where my part which is not felt is bad. I see, by my observes at that my hip is pulled vis-à-vis that. The surge where the warmth is larger moves, passing by me, me makes in order to bite my lip. He turns that head to my one, when opening that eye, I smile modesty tend, my body which is delivered start moving me slowly.

He designates that amount as arch shape; as for little ridicule plays with the corner of that lip. I move at a certain place which has done directly he first, pinching my skin lightly, and try the fact that the fact that exactly at last the brush is used on my fingertip with respect to other things is imitated. That the bit which is small to feeling is added, but I being perplexed by in order to touch by myself before that, then you awakened exactly. I use the brush on my palm lightly in my box which rubs my thumb which crosses my nipple. I create that, he barely with the feeling which puts that hand on my hip which still maintains me jumping. I when I me explore itself body a little, close my eye when he still looks at me simultaneously, exactly. That is decided and is bad; I do not think that we want him who scrutinizes me!

I become and therefore it carries away, I register almost and he starts canceling my belt finally cancel my pants and the zipper. I stop; push that hand, that rises. This time as for him, I generally am pushed making use of that, vis-à-vis the bed. "So now it controls, it is?". He groans deeply with that throat, I blush. Him…As been about probably to recover me he who is seen tilts in order to kiss to me and bites the lip where I damage barely already. That is hurt, but in addition feeling is good… He pulls while having been confused me of that mouth my pants and under the boxer, strongly. As for me I make sit down, laugh him when you observe at that my clothing are thrown to the side grinningly. When he tilts with that heel, I meet to him, that shirt is dispersed, first as for him sitting down in the same way.

I investigate that body illegitimately. He the level box and the remarkable rib somewhere is thin in the same way there in the other place, it is. In the sense that there is he sensitiveness almost there is a very long torso. He crawls tempt to my one, raises my foot around that hip. Kissing to me for the second time, he pushes our naked boxes (l-lolwut? D:) together. I feel and that hand me starts exploring the body for the second time me am lower the back section and under the bit [u]… Suddenly he pulls, is for the second time put completely with profit and that heel from me separated. Me it drags that eye under length of the frame, when he smiles to me, I am deeper, you blush. "You". As for the thing him who has been done first as really not been in the bedroom which can do the thing preparation where we have characteristic, the [bu] [tsu] coming and others [bo] sea urchin you say.

"Wh no thing?". As for me even in my present lightheadedness where it understands that I still may speak, relation. "In you yourself who have been touched". Me complexion becomes cloudy when the he is those words to the color tone whose red is deeper simultaneously. As for the `as for him in order to do those where I think of a certain thing, it is he who has been asked to me? "I think in by my, swallow. "And do that. I think that we would like to see. Just this time, furthermore… where it goes" Although it is that, in order to be perplexed, I the possession do not do in order to follow the selection of other things. As for me the eye where those are beautiful to examine, it cannot say… As for him me under my body my hand…When it can slip, grinningly you laugh start crunching simultaneously, with that thumb


	6. NEW PILOT CHAPTER COME READ!

Title: The Cleaner

Rating: M

Author's note: All right. So, to everyone who didn't get my PM, this is the pilot chapter of the NEW CLEANER. Yes, new. Brand spankin' new. I was absolutely disgusted with the way the other story was going, and after some (quite frank) advice from my readers, decided to redo it. It's been a while since I started it, and I've worked out all the little details of every chapter in my mind, so I know exactly what to do and when to do it. The characters will be kept IN CHARACTER throughout the story, unlike the original. But yes, I'm redoing The Cleaner. Not without everyone's loyal advice, of course.

Yes, you. You reading this. Right now. Hi, whoever you are.

Anyway, so you must REVIEW, so I know whether or not to continue this. The ultimate decision will be my own, but that doesn't mean I'm not going to listen to my readers. Thanks for reading, and uhh... love you all!

Summary: They call me "The Cleaner", but you'll never hear it come from _my _mouth. They call me a God, but I don't believe them. They call me flawed, and I agree. They call me a child, but I'll never listen. He calls me in the middle of the night, and I tell my story.

Summary 2: So it is with reluctance that I embrace who I have become. I am the person, that when you see, you will most likely hate. But I am the person that you have to trust, if you want to live. I am The Cleaner.

Pairings: Like the original, LxLight, blahblahblah.

Disclaimer: I don't own Death Note, but if I did, I can assure you I would've had to HIRE someone to come up with what they came up with. I don't own TLC's "The Cleaner", and I'm sure as Hell glad I don't. The original show "The Cleaner" on TLC is based on a true story.

XxXxXxX

"You ready?" Cho said with a hint of a smile as I followed her into her office. I sat down in the chair across from her cluttered desk, accustomed to the routine already. "We got a good one, this time." I sat quietly, folding my hands on my lap. "You don't look too impressed, Cleaner." I had to force a smile; she knew I hated that name. "Trust me, this one's a doozie."

"Go on. Who is it?" I asked, leaning closer toward her. She swept back her long, chestnut colored hair over her shoulder and opened up a drawer in her desk. I watched her sift through papers—cluttered as always, I thought—before pulling out a small Manila folder. After setting it on top of several other stacks of papers that littered the dark-wood surface, she placed her hands on it and stared at me with grave eyes.

"Are you sure you're ready?" She asked, her stern but feminine voice serious. I gave a friendly smile.

"Cut the crap, Cho. Who is it?" Without another word, she opened up the file and pulled out a piece of paper. I was expecting to hear an ordinary name. It wasn't often that I heard one that I recognized—or that anyone else recognized, for that matter. She stared at it for a few seconds, her thin brows drawing together, obviously trying to create suspense. Sometimes I worried she didn't take her job as seriously as I took mine. "Come on, you know I don't have all day." Finally she looked up to meet my eyes, and handed the paper over toward me. I took it gratefully, relieved that she had stopped playing a game.

"Elle Lawliet." She said simply, as my eyes scanned over the sheet in front of me. "And it's not just somebody with the same name, either. This is the real Elle Lawliet." Although I could see it plain as day in front of my eyes on the paper, I still stared up at her incredulously. "I'm not playing, do you think I would falsify documents?"

"No, let's not add that to your list of offenses." I shot back calmly, and she sighed, leaning back in her chair. I could feel her eyes on me, taking in my—obviously shocked—expression. "So we're talking about the private detective, here? _The_ Elle Lawliet?" She nodded her head, a smirk settling on her full lips. I, too, leaned back in my chair and sighed. It had been a while since someone well-known had contacted me. Even longer since someone from the NPA had contacted me. Cho had been my first case, when I was just sixteen. She now tried to help me out whenever she could, and I considered her almost my partner. She wasn't specified to work with me, but over the years that I had known her, we had developed a tight bond. We were more than just friends—not lovers, by any stretch of the word—but our feelings ran much deeper than just a good friendship. She owed her life to me, and I to her.

"Yep. The Elle Lawliet." She repeated, obviously proud of herself. "He called here this morning asking for you, but I had to tell him you were out. Compiled all the information I could find, and there you go." I set down the paper on her desk, and she took it, sliding it back in the folder. "Pretty neat, huh?"

I folded my arms across my chest, giving her a look that made her smile. "This job is never 'neat', Cho. You know that as much as I do." Nodding her head in an understanding fashion, she waited for me to ask my next question, the one that I always asked. "Tell me about him, will you?"

"Thought you'd never ask." She reached up and undid the small hair clip from the back of her head, and I watched the rest of her long hair fall to her shoulders. It was no secret, Cho was a very attractive woman. However, she was still several years my senior. And something just seemed wrong about getting involved with the people I worked with. She noticed my staring and smirked. "Stop that, Yagami." I rolled my eyes and waved my hand, signaling for her to go on. "All right. Elle Lawliet, he's twenty- five years old. Obviously you know his profession; been working with the NPA for about six years now." She drug her eyes carefully along the paper, looking for something important to tell me. "He has two kids, so you make sure to let me know if you need help with them, okay?" I nodded, and she smiled approvingly.

"Poison of choice?" I asked somewhat jokingly, scooting my chair closer to her desk. Her eyes didn't stray from the paper, but she held up one finger, signaling me to wait.

She closed the folder and clapped her hands together before placing her them on the desk top. "Heroin." I grimaced. "Nasty drug, I know. He was able to tell me that he's been using for years. Unfortunately, he wouldn't tell me how _many _years. He sounded kinda secretive, so work your charms on this one." I glared at her, refusing to let her belittle me, no matter how friendly it was. "Apparently it was his kids that convinced him he needed help. They're both fourteen, and adopted. He's not married, no siblings or anything like that. And that's about all I was able to pull out of him."

"Any known dealers?" I stood up from the chair I had been seated in and walked to stand next to her, opening up the folder again.

She pushed my hands away, and I nudged her gently in the arm. "Nope, but I'll keep prying." I shook my head. She had done enough for me, I didn't want her to have to do extra work; God knew she was already packed enough. Cho worked with Social Services; she was always there to help me when there was a child involved. It happened in a good forty percent of the cases that I took on, and she had never missed a single one. She had a way with kids, they loved her as soon as she began to speak. I wished I had been the same, but she had told me on several occasions it was something you were born with. I thought she was full of it ninety percent of the time.

"You don't have to do that, Cho. I'm sure I can get it out of him." I smiled at her and patted her back softly. "You've done more than enough; thanks so much." She stood up from her desk and handed me the folder, before putting her hair back up with the small clip. "I'll make sure to call you if I have any problems with the children, if I need to get them out of there. You'll be the first person I'll give notice to, trust me." Giving me a wary smile that soon dissolved into a genuine one, she put her arms around me in a tight hug. "I'm fine, okay? No need to worry about me this time." She pulled back, a knowing look on her face.

"You mean it?" I shook my head yes. I really did mean it, this time. It had been a long time since he had even crossed my mind, but the woman in front of me still felt the need to make sure I was all right at all times of the day. I liked her for that. She was a strong willed, stoic woman. When Cho meant business, she really meant business, and that was why I often thought she would have been suited for the job as well as I was. Not that I often thought I was suited for the job, but regardless. "All right, I'll believe you this time." As I began to leave, she caught me by my shoulder. Turning around, I saw her point her finger at me. "You keep your shit together, Yagami." I smiled, knowing that it was only a little tough love from the first life I had saved.

And as I reassured her I would, I couldn't help think back to that night three years ago. That night where I had first realized how brutal being The Cleaner really was.

XxXxXxX

_I supposed it was just my nature, but I was getting worried. Had his parents forgotten about our deal, or were they just busy? Sure, they had forgotten to check in with me a few times before, but never this late. Two and a half hours had passed since the scheduled time, and I was beginning to wonder if something serious was going on. Several attempts to call both their cell—and home—phones had proved to be useless. Which is why I was currently sitting in heavy traffic on the highway, making my agonizingly slow way to the house of the people that were supposed to call me three times a day. I tapped my fingers anxiously against the steering wheel, listening to Cho drone on about why they most likely didn't call. She was on speaker phone, but I felt like shutting it off for now. I had never been a person to jump to conclusions, it just wasn't my thing. Ever since I had taken the job however, I had learned that jumping to conclusions was a big part of it. Jumping to a conclusion could save a life, if the situation was dire enough. "I don't think you're getting it, Cho. What if he ran away from home, or worse? What if they caught him using again?" This particular boy had slipped in and out of using, even after heartfelt commitments of wanting to stop. _

"_That might be the case, but I bet you're thinking of something way worse." I watched as the traffic inched along slowly, and I moved up as well, while still trying to keep a safe distance between myself and the car in front of me. "You told me last time he was serious about it. You said he sounded regretful. Were you just giving in to some sob story again, Yagami?" I rolled my eyes and picked up the phone, glaring at it. _

"_Have you been drinking again?" I shot, and was surprised to hear her laugh. I laughed myself, and found that it eased a bit of the tension I was feeling. "I thought we were over that, Cho." I joked again, and we continued to laugh until I set down the phone. "I'm just teasing you, and you're probably right. I'm probably overreacting again." Before Cho had time to respond, my phone began to buzz, alerting me that I had another call. "Hold on, I got another call, okay?" She agreed, and I connected to the next call. "Raito Yagami speaking, who is this?" I asked, pressing my foot on the gas pedal lightly. There was several seconds of silence, and what sounded like crying in the background before someone finally answered. My heart began to pick up pace as I stared at the phone, puzzled. _

"_We're sorry we didn't get in contact earlier, Yagami-san." I recognized the voice immediately, and was relieved to finally hear from him. The man speaking on the other line was Haruaki Shoda, father to Haruaki Satou. Satou happened to be the young boy I was helping at the time. I had also been in close contact with his parents—obviously—and we had developed a regiment. Satou was finally clean, and had been for a good three weeks. His parents checked in with me three times a day, updating me on their sons progress. So far so good, but as I explained earlier, I hadn't heard from them in a while. Something was wrong with his voice, and it made me look twice at the phone. He sounded horrible, almost haggard in a way. Shoda was a man who liked his bearings straight. The noise in the background still continued, and my doubt began to creep its way back into my system._

"_That's fine, sir. But, if I may ask, why the delay?" Another long pause, and it sounded like the phone was being set down for a second. I waited, glad that the traffic was finally clearing up again and that I could get there faster. I could hear the shuffling as the phone was picked up again, and the words that I heard next were something I had been dreading all along._

"_You need to get over here, Yagami-san. Satou..." He paused, sighing loudly. "He's dead." _

_I nearly lost my control of the wheel, but steadied myself against the blaring of the horns from several other drivers. 'Satou is dead?' I thought to myself, the words seemingly replaying in my head like some foreign language. 'How? I... I spoke to him this morning! He seemed fine! He seemed happy, damn it!' "Satou is dead." I repeated, and heard conformation from the other line immediately. "When did you find this out? I suppose this is the reason for the delay, then." Without waiting for an answer, I continued. "I'm so sorry, sir. If I had any idea that this could happen, that something like this—"_

"_It's not your fault, Yagami-san. Satou killed himself." His voice sounded distant, as if he wasn't quite there. I didn't quite blame him for detaching himself from the situation. Wouldn't it be what anyone else would do? "We found him about an hour ago. I already called the police, so no need to do that. And... that's all. I just wanted to tell you, so you should head over here." I let out my breath loudly, the road in front of me seeming to stretch on forever with my new information. _

"_I already am, sir. I decided to head over when you weren't calling me..." I paused, realizing that the crying in the background must have been his wife. A wave of guilt washed over me, twisting my stomach into knots. I couldn't help from thinking that somehow, Satou's death was my fault. No doubt he would have had an untimely death as well if he continued down the road that using Cocaine had laid in front of him, but something still told me that I could have prevented it. "I'm so sorry." I repeated again, not knowing what else to say. I was explained to thoroughly that—in taking this job—I would see people die. I would see people hurt, I would see people broken almost beyond repair. It was much different when it hit so close to home. _

"_It's not like you didn't do all you could do. You're only a child, Yagami-san." He was right. The first time I had met Satou, I was only sixteen years old. Yet to get my drivers license, Cho was still acting as my chauffeur. She didn't necessarily seem to mind; most of the time, that is. When I hadn't heard from Satou's parents in hours, I decided to screw it and drive nonetheless. "And I should probably tell you. He left a note, before he..." I heard him take in a deep breath, and my heart clenched again. "Before he..."_

"_Yes, I understand." I said knowingly, trying to keep my voice calm as well. I wanted to appear in control in such a situation. I wanted to appear like I knew what I was doing, especially if he was right—if I was only a child myself. "What did the note say, sir?" I wondered briefly if it was an appropriate question to ask at that time, but there was no turning back. I had already asked. _

_I could hear him talking to his wife in the background, and it seemed like she had exhausted all the tears she had in stock. I felt so bad for the poor woman. Satou had been their only son, and they had so many aspirations and dreams for him. He was not stupid by any stretch of the word, and it was hard enough when they found he was doing Cocaine. Even harder still, when they had to come to me. "I'd rather not tell you over the phone. I'll let you read it when you get here, but..." 'But what? Is there something in there I don't know about?' "The note mentions you in quite some detail. He really admired you, Yagami-san." I felt my heart sink, and swallowed back a lump in my throat. _

"_I was just doing my job, sir. Your son was a great boy, I don't know what could have made him to do this." Internally, I was going over what he had said to me that morning when I spoke to him on the phone. I didn't remember anything cryptic, anything telling or hinting at something. But then again, Satou was good at hiding his feelings. He seemed so happy when I had spoken to him, though! He sincerely believed that he would be able to quit using this time with my help, as opposed to all the other times he had vehemently denied me. "Tell your wife that I'm sorry for her loss, and that I'll be there soon. I have to go." He said goodbye quickly, and then hung up the phone. Cho was my other call, so I was transferred to her as soon as he hung up._

"_Raito?" She asked quickly._

"_Yeah, I'm here. Listen, Cho. I have some bad news..." She paused, and I could almost see the expression on her face change in my minds eye. _

"_What is it, Raito? Did something happen with Satou?" I kept my eyes on the road, trying to keep his face out of my mind. "Raito?" She asked again, her usually joking voice becoming concerned._

"_Yeah, something happened with him." I took a deep breath before speaking. "He... apparently he killed himself, Cho." Silence. I understood that it must have been hard for her to take in as well. She and Satou had met on several occasions, and had become friends. He had developed a huge crush on her over time, and—frankly—I didn't blame him. I waited patiently for her to speak again. _

"_Oh." She finally said, and I almost laughed at how little it was. "Do you know why?" Cho had trained herself to be hard-shelled, she was just that kind of woman. I could tell that she was exerting that skill in full force now, trying not to let his death wreak havoc on her mind. _

"_No idea. But his parents mentioned he left a note, so I'll be taking a look at that when I get there. You might want to head on over, too." She agreed, and after a few more moments of silence, we both decided it would be good to hang up. Exchanging brief goodbyes, I finally regained my concentration on the road once I heard the 'click' of her putting down the phone. 'I wonder what that note said, and—Oh, God. He didn't mention us, did he?'_ _Unfortunately, it was true. About three weeks into the process of getting Satou clean, we began a relationship. It was nothing, really. Nothing except having sex, occasionally. Don't get me wrong, I knew it was a terrible thing to do. One of the warnings I had been given was to never get too friendly with your clients. Because—like I said—they could always end up underground soon enough. 'I can't believe he's really gone. I worked so hard with him... What would have made him do this?' I focused my eyes on the road, but not long after, I felt a warm tear slide down my cheek. I wiped it away hurriedly with the back of my hand. I didn't want to cry, not even when I was alone. 'Satou wouldn't want me to cry, would he? No, he wouldn't. I know he wouldn't.' _

_After several more minutes of agonizing silence alone with my thoughts, I made a turn into their street, and parked at the curb in front of their house. I could see two figures standing in the driveway; it was obviously Satou's parents. A squad car was already parked in the driveway, and I wondered when Cho was going to get here. No doubt she had left—during, or after—our phone conversation. Stepping out of the car quickly, I walked swiftly up to the grieving couple standing in front of their home. I shook Shoda's hand briskly, but it was obvious his wife was too upset to acknowledge me. "I'm so sorry," I repeated for what felt like the thousandth time that night. "I had no idea Satou would do something like this. If I had any way of knowing, I would have prevented it. This is... this is all my fault, I'm so sorry." Shoda laid a hand on my shoulder, and I closed my mouth immediately. _

"_It's not your fault, Yagami-san. I told you, you did all you could." I looked down at my feet, trying to convince myself that his father was right. "Here's the note he left. We wanted you to read it." I looked up just in time to see him hand me a crumpled piece of paper, with Satou's distinctive handwriting covering every inch of it. I took it gratefully, and began to read._

_'Whoever has the misfortune to read this note,' It started out, and it felt ironic somewhat. 'If my suicide hasn't gone horribly awry, then I am dead at the time you are reading this. I should start by saying first of all, that I am sorry, Mom and Dad. I know you had hopes and dreams for my future, and I know I dashed them all when I started snorting Cocaine. It was a stupid thing to do, I realize that now. But drugs grab you and hook you in, and I was far too gone to understand that. I know you felt reluctant to call Raito, to call The Cleaner, but he was the only person that could help me. You tried your best, you had very little patience with me. But what you did have, you made it seem like so much more in the way you spoke, the way you acted, everything that you have done for me. Thank you. I know compassion was the last thing I deserved after being so selfish.' I took a deep breath, knowing internally that he was going to speak about me next. 'Secondly, I am sorry, Raito. You worked with me every day that I have known you, and never gave up. Even when I gave in to my addiction, you were there. You are the closest thing to God-sent that I have ever known, especially since you know what it's like to give up and give in. How someone as young as myself could do what you do is beyond me, but you do it wonderfully. You save lives every day, and all I did was get high. I suppose some of these underlying causes are self-worth issues, but I'm not in the right frame of mind to tell. Lastly, you might be wondering why I am doing this. I know it's selfish, I know my parents will be losing a big part of their life, and I know Raito will be losing a very special friend. I am a selfish person. Why do you think I began drugs? It wasn't for anyone other than myself, that's for sure. But the reason I am doing this, is because I don't want to go on living knowing that I am a disappointment to the three most wonderful people in my pathetic life. I have let each and every one of you down in my own way. Dad, I have let you down because of all those nights I was too high to speak to you, like we always used to do before the Cocaine. Mom, I have let you down by dashing all the dreams you had in store for me. Of growing up and becoming an architect like my father, or following my own path in life. Raito, I have let you down from all the times I slipped up, and began using without your permission. I could see the disappointment in your eyes, and that was the last thing I wanted from you. I wanted your approval, but it was obvious I wasn't going to get it while I was alive. Suicide is the easy way out, I know that. But I feel like I have no other choice. So to conclude this note, I will say again that I am sorry. I am sorry Dad, I am sorry Mom, I am sorry Raito. Hopefully you will find it in your hearts to forgive me. Goodbye.' _

_I stared at the note for several more seconds, taking in everything I had read. 'All he wanted was my approval. If I had given it to him, if I hadn't been so hard on him, then... No. That's not it. If I wasn't as hard on him as I had been, than he wouldn't have been clean when he died.' Slowly, I handed the note back to Shoda. "Saying 'everything will be okay' now wouldn't be the best way to ease the situation, I know that. Everything won't be okay now, but it will be later on. You will grieve, and then it will get better. Just do me a favor, please."_

"_What is that, Yagami-san?" _

"_Don't forget him. Don't forget Satou." _

XxXxXxX

My name is Yagami Raito. I am twenty years old. Four years ago, I struck a deal with my Father (Chief of Police) and began working at the NPA for a special position they had open. That special position just happened to be "The Cleaner." It's a horrible title, I know. I hate it, personally. It describes my work; describes what I do, but it's not what I do that describes _me_. If you're wondering what it is exactly that I do, it's just what my job description says. I help people get clean. Get over their addictions. Whether it be gambling, drugs, sex, alcohol, they call me. I am the one that brings them back forth into a normal life. Only a few of the people I have helped have ever gone back to their vices, and even then I was able to help them a second time. However, not everyone I have helped have lived. Some have taken their own lives, some have been killed by angry dealers... you get the picture. It's a brutal world, and I am the one that has to realize that; try and do something about it.

When people see me in the NPA, I have one name that they all call me. I am—to them—"The Cleaner". To some of them, I am a joke. To others, I am a God, and should be revered as such. I don't take to any of those, insults or compliments, lightly. I'm a normal person. I've been down the same road of the people I help, and I know what it's like. To some I am too flawed, to others I am perfect. It seems like I can never get in the middle of the spectrum; all I get is both ends coming at me with tremendous force. Most people would agree—The Cleaner is not a job for a twenty-year-old kid. Let alone a sixteen-year-old kid, which is how old I was when I started. It was a pretty ridiculous deal, now that I think back on all those years ago. But it kept me out of a Juvenile Center, and out of Rehab so I was happy to take whatever I could get. Four years down, three years to go.

Sometimes I feel like I have seen everything there is to see. I have seen people broken beyond their limits, driven to their very last thread of sanity. I have seen people tangled so deep in the throws of addiction that they have lost everything. They have lost their family, their job, their home; everything that they ever had before they went down the wrong path. I have seen people lose their faith—but I'm certainly not one to talk. I talk to God sometimes, and people have told me that he will answer back. Of course, I've never gotten an answer. Or maybe I have, and I've just missed it. I have a tendency to do that.

In the long run, I suppose I will never be anything more than The Cleaner. There will be others that come after me; there were others that came before me, after all. And there will be others after that, and each of them will leave the NPA with just a title. A title that has to be the most horrible experience of my life. People might say that it's wonderful to see that you've made a difference, but sometimes I can't see the difference that I have made. Sure, I've changed a persons life. But what about all the others that have yet to be changed? If I'm unable to get to them, how much of an impact have I really made? So it is with reluctance that I embrace who I have become. I am the person, that when you see, you will most likely hate. But I am the person that you have to trust, if you want to live.

I am The Cleaner.

XxXxXxX

Author's note: Hey guyyyyssss. So I know I was kinda serious or whatever up in the A/N up there, but I couldn't think of anything funny to say. D: I'm losing my touch, people. Oh well. So, I know this chapter is kinda short and all, but it's just a pilot. I want some effin' feedback, so I know whether or not to continue it. All right? All right. Thank you.

So uhhh... REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW and ignore my shameless self-promotion. 8D


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